Author: Donald Rogers © 1999

Whenever possible, permission to use a joke is gained from the author.

As with anything the Government gets involved in, we have to be  careful here.

While I understand the original concept was to recall "unsafe" subs  and fix the safety issue, it has since grown in proportion to the  number of politicians involved.

The California Congressmen now want to make them enviromentially friendly and have asked for a  conversion device to reduce the amount  of gasses expelled.  They are also asking for subs to meet a 200  stroke per mile minimum. 

The Utah Congressmen have asked that if a Dom has more then one sub,  a safety warning be permently placed on the subs indicating they  could be hazardous to the health of the Dom.

Arizona New Mexico and Texas Congressmen have asked for two things. An import quota on subs into thier states to protect the jobs of the  subs already there (dancer and raven et al) and also wants to have  them permanently marked to make sure proof of ownership can be  provided for tax purposes.

Michigan Congressmen want a quota on the import of foreign subs to  protect American markets.

The IRS wants to tax Doms with subs under some sort of entertainment  tax.

The FDA is looking into the potential health hazards of owning a sub,  citing an increase in heart attacks and repetative stress injuries.

The Secret Service, as part of the US Treasury, is looking into the  counterfitting of subs and may want to redesign them to include  holographic seals of authenticity.

The Department of Energy is looking into solar powered subs to reduce  American dependance on fossil subs.

The Deparment of Defense is looking into a potenital sub gap between  the US and third world countires, claiming that we are behind in this  vital area of National Defense.  They are seeking 22 billion dollars  for research and development in this area.

The Department of Education is asking for 10 billion dollars to  increase public awareness of subs and cites a recently uncovered 1845  study which says that American subs are less educated in the 
submissive arts then European subs. 

The State Department is looking into the possibility of recognizing  SubNation as a foreign country so they could receive foregin aid  monies.

Vice President Gore is talking about putting subs on the endangered  species list.

President Clinton is looking into the possibilitiy of owning a couple  so he won't have to depend on interns.  There is negociations with  Hillary ongoing to see if she gets her own or they have to share.

The US Supreme Court is trying to decide if it will hear a California  case concerning the issue of is a sub considered community property  in a divorce.

Microsoft lobbists are trying to get a bill passed that all subs have  to come with a copy of Windows 98 and a new microsoft sub browser  installed.

So you see, while the orignal concept was good on the face of it, it  has snowballed.

Don (in exceptional rare form today trying to handle other problems  and needing the comic relief)