Some people spend hours upon hours searching for a prospective partner. They scour newsgroups, bulletin boards, chat rooms, personal ads, and more. They answer email upon email. All in an attempt to meet the right person for them. With the advent of the internet, this cyber dating has grown in numbers and will probably continue to grow as time goes on. Especially with the ever growing number of new people learning about the lifestyle and the ever growing number of people who own home computers.  

A person finds a few prospective partner and begins talking with them over the net. They are trying to form a relationship and decide compatibility. They talk for hours, or just a few short days about everything under the sun or very little outside of BDSM and sexual fantasies. They find someone who likes the same things they do, or someone who is wanting to learn from them about the lifestyle, or someone who really excites them with the things he/she says. For a new person to the lifestyle, this can be a very confusing period of time. This dating process can be quite frustrating, exciting, scary, intimidating, heart pounding, anticipatory and more all at once. 

Finding a partner is not easy, and there are many things which need to be discussed before any scening occurs. For those who are new in the lifestyle, there are many things to learn about themselves, the lifestyle in general, the use of the implements in the lifestyle and others views on the lifestyle that the amount of information can be intimidating and ignored because of that. It is extremely important that a person knows at the very least, the general ideas of what BDSM is, the basics of what they want and need in a relationship and how to use the implements correctly. A person is solely responsible for their own safety. 

Eventually they will meet a person they think is "The One!" their soul mate. Now they want to set up a meeting as soon as possible. They want to be able to look this person in the eye, believing that the chemistry which exists over the computer will be even more intense in real life. Setting up the initial meeting can be an exciting time. One filled with many different emotions, some of which can cloud better judgment, some of which do not. These emotions are all quite normal.  

If you feel that you have found the right partner for yourself and are wanting to set up (or have already started planning for) a first meeting, please read the following articles. Keep in mind they are presented to help those who are using the internet as a resource for finding a partner to do so as safely as possible. 

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