Presents:
BDSM Discussion 29
Role Play
In BDSM
All Comments Posted Here With Permission Of The Participants
Session Start:
Sun Aug 27 18:24:25 2000
[21:03] * ravenshad says Hello and welcome to leather and roses' weekly discussions on BDSM the following rules apply..
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[21:04] <ravenshad> Tonight's topic is Role Playing In BDSM...let's start with this one...what is role playing?
[21:06] <Ron1962> Role Play......the taking on of an assumed Identity or the playing out of a set of fictional circumstances....IE. Ron I moved the couch by myself.....
[21:07] <ravenshad> role playing, is the assuming of a character or something that is not your true identity...in my opinion anyway...
[21:07] <Thundernt> Role playing is just that playing a role. It could be a jail scene, an interrogation, just about anything one enjoys.
[21:07] <ravenshad> ok..some people consider all of BDSM to be role playing..that one assumes the role of a dom or a sub..what are your thoughts on this?
[21:08] <{sonja}JP> i dont think so.....
[21:08] <ravenshad> why not sonja?
[21:08] <{sonja}JP> lemme rephrase...i dont think so if it is 24/7
[21:08] <EZRiser> ignorance is bliss ... and some ppl stay in heaven ..
[21:08] * Ron1962 chuckles....If you feel Dom or sub all the time acting vanilla is role play is it not?
[21:08] <Ron1962> LOL EZRiser
[21:08] <{sonja}JP> i would agree...
[21:09] <Thundernt> in my opinion, one is either dominant or submissive or a mixture of. It is what one is, I believe it is the core essence of ones personality.
[21:09] <{sonja}JP> i think if it is something you do just for fun, then it could be considered a role playing thing
[21:09] <{sonja}JP> but if it is the way you live your life...then it isnt a role it is your life
[21:10] * Ron1962 nods.....Yes for some of us it is.....for others the Dom or sub side is shrouded with the "niceties" that society calls polite behaviour......LOL...I am getting over that.....
[21:10] <ravenshad> core essence of one's personality..I can agree with that Thundernt quite easily...
[21:11] <ravenshad> as well sonja, I agree that in a 24/7 being dominant or submissive is not a role that is assumed..it is who/what the people are..
[21:11] <ravenshad> so if being dominant or submissive is not just role playing at BDSM, in a lifestyle relationship, then what constitutes role play wihtin BDSM?
[21:12] <{sonja}JP> i think it might get confused by - forexample - i am not "submissive" with others - just One - so some might see that as putting on a role with Him - though it isnt
[21:12] <Thundernt> I live a 24/7... I am also very active in the Dallas area. It is my lifestyle, not something I play on the week end.
[21:12] <Ron1962> The acting out of scenes?
[21:12] <EZRiser> assuming an identy for a scene or session that is out of your ordinary character ..
[21:13] * Ron1962 nods...Well said EZRiser
[21:13] <{sonja}JP> is it role playing if one is acting out a scene but with their normal personality?
[21:13] <EZRiser> no its not
[21:14] <{sonja}JP> what is that?
[21:14] <Thundernt> in my view role play would be taking on the identity of a police officer during an interrogation scene.
[21:14] <EZRiser> they would be admitting to themselves & their partner what or who they are ..
[21:15] <{sonja}JP> but if you are still a "dominant" police officer.....
[21:15] <ravenshad> I agree Thundernt
[21:16] <Thundernt> sonja.. there are many roles and true as a dominant I would play the dominant role. but a switch might decide to play a submissive role when generally they are in top space.
[21:16] <ravenshad> but if he is not a police officer in real life, then he is acting the "role" of a police officer...
[21:17] <{sonja}JP> thats what i was asking before...
[21:17] <Ron1962> But what if I wanted to play a punishment scene?.....but my submissive had done nothing to warrent such a scene....would that not be role play in a sense EZRiser?
[21:17] <{sonja}JP> i thought it was getting around to you have to change personalities to be role playing
[21:18] <ravenshad> I think to a certain extent you have to, kind of like acting..say someone wants to do an interrogation scene, yet their inherent personality is not the same as an interrogator would be...then they would have to "act" like an interrogator...
[21:18] <ravenshad> I'm not sure that made any sense..
[21:18] <Ron1962> Yeah it did ravenshad
[21:18] <EZRiser> I dont think so Ron .. thats just a different type or variation of a scene
[21:19] <{sonja}JP> i got it
[21:19] <Ron1962> Ok EZRiser....thought it was applicable
[21:19] <ravenshad> like a rapte fantasy scene..the male may not have any real desire to rape a woman, and would never do such a thing..but he must act like he thinks a rapist would, make it as "real" as possible for the sub...thus, changing his personality..
[21:20] <{sonja}JP> that was the thought i had earlier - but it seemed to complicated.
[21:20] <ravenshad> speaking of personality, could doing certain role play scenes, like an interrogation scene or rape scene, cause a person's inherent personality to change? to have some difficulty dropping the role
[21:20] * ravenshad nods..I understand that sonja..
[21:20] <LadyMist> but does it really change his personality? or is it just as an actor tores to 'be' the character...
[21:20] <{sonja}JP> oh goodness......maybe if they did it too long...
[21:20] <ravenshad> I think it's the actor trying to be the character LM..
[21:21] <{sonja}JP> but i played the vanilla role for years......didnt change me :-)
[21:21] <LadyMist> I think maybe if they were to become that way normally...
[21:21] <panda^> if one kept the role indefinitely it might change his personality
[21:21] <LadyMist> ie IF I were tending to be a rapist...pretending to be one would open the door...
[21:21] <{sonja}JP> eventually a true personality surfaces....
[21:21] <panda^> very true LadyMist
[21:21] <LadyMist> agreed
[21:21] <ravenshad> yes LM..
[21:21] <{sonja}JP> that makes sense
[21:22] <panda^> as a Master who might have abusive tendencies would turn into one
[21:22] <ravenshad> so then could we say, when it comes to role play scenes, one has to take into consideration that it may take some time for the participants to completely "lose" the role and be themselves again?
[21:22] <LadyMist> I might want want to be a sadist but nothing but the character trait can 'make' me take pleasure in anothers pain...
[21:22] <panda^> an abuser that is
[21:22] <EZRiser> then the person's personality would also dictate their preference in the types of scenes they get involved it ..
[21:22] <LadyMist> yes EZ
[21:23] <LadyMist> I don't think it would take time...
[21:23] <LadyMist> unless it was too close to home...
[21:23] <LadyMist> to natural so to speak...
[21:23] <panda^> right
[21:23] <ravenshad> Ahh yes EZ...but then, in the case where the sub needs or craves a particular scene, would the dominant try it to "please" the sub, maybe as a reward?
[21:23] <ravenshad> could be LM..
[21:23] <LadyMist> I would... and do try on new 'clothes' to reward a sub...
[21:24] * Ron1962 nods to LadyMist....True.....I can and have "played " a rapist........but slipping out of that character was a....relief
[21:24] <ravenshad> it is not part of your normal personality Ron..
[21:24] <EZRiser> I could see a Dom doing that for his sub .. yes
[21:24] <LadyMist> I can either do it again... or not...depending on how much *I* liked it...
[21:24] <LadyMist> or the ease with which I could do it for her...
[21:24] * Ron1962 grumbles......and scratches out rapist as a possible carrer move.....
[21:24] <ravenshad> LOL Ron
[21:25] <EZRiser> and twice if you really liked it ..
[21:25] <panda^> heh Ron1962
[21:25] * LadyMist chuckles...
[21:25] <Ron1962> Oh well.....very little momey in raping anyway.....
[21:25] <ravenshad> that's a good point LM...the dominants comfort level has to be taken into consideration as well..
[21:25] <{sonja}JP> well thats a relief
[21:25] * LadyMist smiles...
[21:25] <ravenshad> ok Ron, be careful, someone might think you're serious.. LOL
[21:25] <ravenshad> so how does one set up a role play scene?
[21:25] <{sonja}JP> now......raping and pillaging....
[21:25] <{sonja}JP> you just have to be a viking...
[21:25] <LadyMist> the dominant who mentored me said " you don't know who is going to be lovely and persuasive" I think she borrowed it from Warren...
[21:26] * Ron1962 nods....Oh yes....there have been a role or two I have played that struck a powerful coard in me.......
[21:26] * ravenshad thinks of pirates and tavern wenches..
[21:26] <{sonja}JP> :-)
[21:26] <ravenshad> Yup..a viking would be interesting.. :)
[21:26] * LadyMist wags eyebrows suggestively...
[21:26] <ravenshad> which ones Ron?
[21:26] * ravenshad has never done a role play scene...
[21:27] <{sonja}JP> i wouldnt be terribly disappointed if you wanted to continue that "how to set up a role playing scene" with the fantasy rape idea
[21:27] <LadyMist> costumes...
[21:27] <ravenshad> OK..lets get specific...how would one go about setting up a fantasy rape scene?
[21:27] <{sonja}JP> oh goody - thanks raven
[21:27] <LadyMist> scholl girl clothes...
[21:27] <LadyMist> school even...
[21:27] <pbear^> we did it at Dreams to Reality in Omaha in Feb
[21:27] <EZRiser> all depends on where that scene would take place first
[21:28] <LadyMist> oh... 'notices we went on to rape...'
[21:28] <ravenshad> ok..costumes..for a fantasy rape scene..for the woman, clothes that could be torn or cut up ...hand me downs, or real old clothes..
[21:28] * Ron1962 smiles....The angry dom......I had spanked for play many times....but someone wanted a scene for punishment.....wanted it to be just for that...punishment....and when I did it I found that it fit very naturally....
[21:28] <LadyMist> yep... I hate getting stuff I like cut off...
[21:28] <ravenshad> sorry LM..being a bit more specific...we can get back to general ways in a moment..just remind me :)
[21:28] <LadyMist> s'ok...
[21:28] <ravenshad> ahhh..makes sense Ron.. :)
[21:29] * pbear^ nods to Ron1962
[21:29] <ravenshad> should such a scene be discussed at great length though before it is attempted?
[21:29] <{sonja}JP> what about a further game.....
[21:29] <{sonja}JP> way way discussed
[21:29] <{sonja}JP> for example......
[21:29] <LadyMist> depends on the sub and the dome...
[21:29] <EZRiser> it should be agreed upon .. but thats it ...
[21:29] <LadyMist> if they have known each other for a while and know the hot buttons and the cold one.s...
[21:29] <ravenshad> possible flashback triggers revealed..in the case of a sub who has been raped in the past..yet still craves such a scene..
[21:29] <pbear^> ravenshad when we did it...the sub wanted it to be a surprise but her Dom had told us of her fantasy of it......so it was pre planned first
[21:29] <EZRiser> it should come as a total surprise to the submissive
[21:29] <ravenshad> and a safeword to stop the scene if it overpowers the sub's emotions/mental capacity..
[21:29] <ravenshad> yes EZ
[21:29] <LadyMist> good way to relive and overcome the rape...
[21:29] <Ron1962> Depends on the scene.......I think a rape scene should not be discussed too much.....for is not part of it the suspense of what will happen to me next?
[21:30] <ravenshad> true LM...
[21:30] <ravenshad> yes LM
[21:30] <{sonja}JP> this is why i asked....Master and i were trying to set one up...
[21:30] * LadyMist listens...
[21:30] <LadyMist> what happened?
[21:30] <{sonja}JP> He was going to "abduct" me in a shopping mall parking lot....all He told me was that it would be one of three days...
[21:30] <ravenshad> I didn't say discuss the specifics of the scene..but the emotional mental impact of it..why the person wants it..stuff like that Ron...but one could discuss the many different posible actions in the scene, without saying this is exactly what will happen, thus perserving the suspense..
[21:31] * ravenshad listens to sonja..
[21:31] <LadyMist> did it go well for the both of you?
[21:31] <pbear^> this was done in a dungeon at a play party where there were many people around to help or stop it
[21:31] <{sonja}JP> before we ever said anything further.....i thought of this...if someone had seen Him doing that - there would be problems.....
[21:31] * Ron1962 nods,....Yeah....I can see that...or setting a time frame like JP & {sonja}JP have done
[21:31] <{sonja}JP> {imagining cop stopping Him}
[21:32] <{sonja}JP> havent done :-(
[21:32] <ravenshad> yup..that's a possibility in a "capture" scene...
[21:32] <Ron1962> Yikes.,.....a definete scene stopper {sonja}JP
[21:32] <LadyMist> would you fight enough to cause such a scene to draw that kind of notice?
[21:32] <{sonja}JP> so if it is not thouroughly discussed
[21:32] <pbear^> this gal did
[21:32] <pbear^> but she wanted it that way
[21:32] <Ron1962> How did it go panda?
[21:32] <{sonja}JP> no, but just the snatch could arouse a good Samaritan
[21:32] <pbear^> it went off just great Ron1962
[21:32] <ravenshad> I would think, and for me I know it is fact, the sub would fight as much as they would if they were truly attacked..to get into and stay in the "victim" mindset...to get that "reality" feeling of the scene..
[21:33] <{sonja}JP> exactly
[21:33] <pbear^> 5 took her down and undressed her first
[21:33] <ravenshad> true sonja..
[21:33] <{sonja}JP> i would want to
[21:33] <ravenshad> that's a gang rape :(
[21:33] <pbear^> no
[21:33] <LadyMist> maybe she wanted it that way...
[21:33] <Ron1962> Gang rapes can be fantasies too......
[21:33] <pbear^> then her Dom took over
[21:33] <ravenshad> true..I'm sorry forgive the :(...I was out of line with it..
[21:33] <ravenshad> ahh..I see..
[21:34] <pbear^> she is a big girl and he could not get her down alone but she wanted it that way
[21:34] <LadyMist> Milord can't without throttling me...
[21:34] <ravenshad> ahhh...I see..she wanted to be overpowered...
[21:34] <LadyMist> he taught me too much martial arts...
[21:34] <pbear^> yes ravenshad
[21:34] * LadyMist laughs
[21:34] * ravenshad giggles at LM...
[21:34] * Ron1962 makes a note not to tick LadyMist off......
[21:34] * Amax grins...
[21:34] <ravenshad> smart move Ron :)
[21:35] <pbear^> lol Ron1962
[21:35] <{sonja}JP> making same note
[21:35] <LadyMist> I think it would take a few people.... to take me down seriously...
[21:35] * LadyMist snorts...
[21:35] <ravenshad> it probably would..
[21:35] * ravenshad giggles
[21:35] <LadyMist> I don't hurts friends...
[21:35] <pbear^> it took 5 plus her Dom
[21:35] <LadyMist> especially those who laugh at my typos....
[21:35] <pbear^> hehe
[21:35] * Ron1962 smiles.....Well....to really struggle to "get into" the mindset....yeah it might take a few people.......
[21:35] <ravenshad> ok...so in her case, panda it was discussed with others before hand...but beyond the fact of her Dom telling her it would eventually happen, did they discuss it alot, or do you not know?
[21:36] <pbear^> she had asked for it but he did not tell her it was going to happen
[21:36] <pbear^> he got 5 of us together and asked us to help him do it
[21:36] <pbear^> she was taken totally by surprise
[21:36] <ravenshad> ok..so you wouldn't know whether or not they had discussed it before hand and what topics those discussions entailed..
[21:36] <ravenshad> yes..she would be...knowing it would happen..but not knowing when...
[21:37] <pbear^> i know she had it as a fantasy for a long time and he knew this
[21:37] <ravenshad> ok panda..
[21:37] <{sonja}JP> i think for that particular scene, that is the way it almost has to be done
[21:37] <ravenshad> yes sonja ..it is...
[21:37] <LadyMist> we didn't discuss it much other than... what he already knew...like my head hanging off the bed was a big NO...
[21:37] <pbear^> she is a switch and was in Domme mode when it happened
[21:37] * LadyMist shodders...
[21:37] <pbear^> oooooo
[21:37] <LadyMist> I feel for her... I would fight TWICE as hard...
[21:38] <pbear^> she was a bear to take down believe me
[21:38] <{sonja}JP> the balance between knowing enough to keep out of trouble and still keep it "real" enough to be fun
[21:38] <ravenshad> that is a difficult balance to find in such a scene..
[21:38] <pbear^> each of us had a limb and one undressed her
[21:38] <{sonja}JP> why we are struggling with it....
[21:38] <{sonja}JP> i wouldnt want the whole group thing - even just in the beg.
[21:39] <ravenshad> neither would I sonja...
[21:39] <pbear^> she wanted to be able to be real and fight
[21:39] <ravenshad> ok, lets get back to general stuff...
[21:39] * Ron1962 nods......I think a scene like a rape would for Me have to be a one on one thing
[21:39] <pbear^> nor would i
[21:39] <LadyMist> duck tape and a knife works well for solos...
[21:39] <ravenshad> true LM.. :)
[21:39] <pbear^> yes LM
[21:40] <{sonja}JP> we talked about chloroform *g*
[21:40] * Ron1962 perks and takes a note....duct tape.....knife...no wait straight razor......
[21:40] <{sonja}JP> discarded that quickly
[21:40] <ravenshad> that would be interesting...but possibly too dangerous...
[21:40] * LadyMist shivers delishiously...
[21:40] <Ron1962> Oh yes....no cloroform.....can give you a killer headache.......
[21:40] <{sonja}JP> right....needs expert advice...
[21:40] * ravenshad giggles..
[21:40] * LadyMist shudders at the spelling...
[21:40] <{sonja}JP> found that out
[21:40] <EZRiser> nitrous oxide .. they wouldnt care ..
[21:40] <{sonja}JP> lol
[21:40] <ravenshad> LOL EZ..true but kind of hard to get one's hands on..
[21:40] <Ron1962> LOL EZ
[21:40] <pbear^> very true EZRiser
[21:41] <LadyMist> that's NO fun...
[21:41] <pbear^> depends on where one works Ron1962
[21:41] <ravenshad> unless of course the sub or dom worked in an operating room or dentist's office.. :)
[21:41] <Ron1962> Ok general stuff
[21:41] <EZRiser> very easy to get hold of .. a can of reddiwhip is full of it
[21:41] <LadyMist> NO whip hits...
[21:41] <ravenshad> I didn't know that EZ...
[21:41] <{sonja}JP> explain pls
[21:41] <LadyMist> BAD for the brain cells...
[21:41] <pbear^> it's the pressure gas they use
[21:41] * LadyMist abhors whip hits...
[21:41] <ravenshad> whip hits LM?
[21:42] <Ron1962> Yeah....oxygen deprivation.......
[21:42] <pbear^> reddi whip ravenshad
[21:42] <LadyMist> course since the stroke I can't afford to lose any more than I have already loist...LOL
[21:42] <ravenshad> Ohhh...ok panda..sniffing it..I understand..
[21:42] <pbear^> yes
[21:42] <LadyMist> reddi whip inhalition...
[21:42] <LadyMist> BAD thing...'G'
[21:42] <ravenshad> thanks LM :)
[21:42] <LadyMist> yep....
[21:43] <ravenshad> I think a rape scene is one of the most difficult role play scenes to enact...so many things could go wrong..and so many things have to be thought of, considered and looked at before attempting it..
[21:43] <Ron1962> Can role play enhance a relationship?......
[21:43] <pbear^> sometimes
[21:43] <EZRiser> or add spice to ..
[21:44] <ravenshad> yes..if it is something everyone involved enjoys doing...it could make them feel closer to one another...
[21:44] <ravenshad> yes EZ
[21:45] <EZRiser> wouldnt role play be another, less obtrusive avenue of expanding and exploring ones limits
[21:45] <ravenshad> do you think role play can enhance a relationship, is the question on the table..
[21:45] <pbear^> i think so EZRiser
[21:45] <ravenshad> yes I think so EZ..
[21:45] <ravenshad> how can role play enhance a relationship? (to expand upon the original question)
[21:45] <{sonja}JP> everyone talks about "keeping the spice" - role play would def. be an avenue to that...
[21:46] <ravenshad> yes..it would be that..
[21:46] <pbear^> it can help build trust
[21:46] <ravenshad> how so panda?
[21:46] * Ron1962 nods...... A "safe" way of realizing a fantasy which could not be acted out in any other way....legally anyway....like the rape scene.....or the kidnap scene
[21:46] * Ron1962 listens to panda
[21:47] <pbear^> i like ageplay and the Mistress i have now allows it so we can get to know each other more so and i have learned to trust her fully because of this
[21:47] <ravenshad> ok that makes sense since in age play..one person has to literally think with the mind of the age they selected..usually fairly young..
[21:48] <pbear^> i am about 10
[21:48] * Ron1962 nods....Not exactly my cup of tea....but I can see how that would allow you to let her see deeper facutes of you panda
[21:48] <panda^> yes it does Ron1962
[21:48] <ravenshad> it would also cause a deeper sense of vulnerability, thus requiring more trust...
[21:49] <panda^> and i see how she acts in the role of the Mommy and then how to expect her to be as the Mistress
[21:49] <ravenshad> ageplay is one of the more common role play scenarios..not just for lifetsyle bdsm relationships, but for those who engage in play sessions only...why do you think that is?
[21:49] <panda^> we have been together 4 times now and it is working well
[21:49] * Ron1962 nods....I think role play could be valuable in that aspect....to keep the spice...and to allow oneself to open up things that they as themselves would want to keep hidden.....
[21:50] <panda^> some of us cant be in this 24/7
[21:50] <panda^> because of other committments
[21:50] <panda^> so play sessions have to be sufficient
[21:50] <{sonja}JP> i dont know raven - thats a good question
[21:50] <panda^> or brief 24/7 times
[21:51] <ravenshad> I wasn't asking why a play session relationship..I was asking what the attraction is to ageplay panda..
[21:51] <panda^> we usually have about 3-4 days together at a time
[21:51] * Ron1962 chuckles.....Cause some like me refuse to grow up?
[21:51] <ravenshad> question on the table is why do you think people are drawn to age play sessions?
[21:51] <ravenshad> that could be Ron..
[21:52] <panda^> same here Ron1962 i think
[21:52] <{sonja}JP> or perhaps it is just one of those "forbidden things"
[21:52] <panda^> a part of me is still a little girl
[21:52] <ravenshad> what about a person trying to "recapture their childhood" and/or get the mother/father love they never had as a child?
[21:52] <EZRiser> Ron .. we grow older .. not up .. toys just get more expensive
[21:52] <ravenshad> yes..could be that as well sonja..
[21:52] <ravenshad> LOL EZ
[21:52] <panda^> very possibly ravenshad
[21:52] * Ron1962 smiles and ^5's EZRiser
[21:52] <{sonja}JP> i have noticed that problem in men EZ
[21:52] <{sonja}JP> lol
[21:52] <ravenshad> LOLOL sonja
[21:53] <EZRiser> hey .. I resemble that remark
[21:53] <{sonja}JP> oooohhh - did i say that outloud?
[21:53] <panda^> only difference between the men and the boys is the price and size of their toys
[21:53] <Ron1962> Yeah you did {sonja}JP.....Hey...where is JP anyway.....LOL
[21:53] <ravenshad> could using age play as a way to heal past neglect (real or imagined) be a dangerous thing to do?
[21:53] * panda^ whistles innocently
[21:53] <{sonja}JP> He is different......
[21:53] <panda^> dangerous??? how so???
[21:53] * Amax chuckles and slowly shakes his head
[21:53] <{sonja}JP> i would say no, if you both knew what you were doing
[21:54] <{sonja}JP> yes, if only one is aware
[21:54] <Ron1962> I dont know about dangerious....but if one was subject to abuse of some type it could open old wounds....
[21:54] <panda^> true Ron1962
[21:54] <ravenshad> possible flash backs, say the person had lived through sexual abuse or something, and doesn't fully recall it..then gets into age play..and inadvertently the memories are triggered...
[21:54] <ravenshad> yes Ron..
[21:55] <ravenshad> what about mentally? if age play is taken to a 24/7 relationship..done all the time...could it cause mental problems with someone though process or things like that?
[21:55] * panda^ craves love and acceptance from Mistress as Mommy because she was starved for it growing up she thinks
[21:55] <ravenshad> that's possible panda..
[21:55] <Ron1962> Then again....sometimes the only way to heal those types of wounds is to bring them out in the open.....hopefully in a controlled enviornment....with a qualified speciallist...and I am not thinking of Dominatrix Madeline
[21:56] <{sonja}JP> but i think it is possible to crave the same even when one had it as a child...
[21:56] <panda^> bringing them out is good but fullfilling them is the key
[21:56] <ravenshad> yes it is sonja...
[21:56] <{sonja}JP> i LOVE the daddy in Master
[21:56] <{sonja}JP> and i had 2 great daddys - one of whom is a Dom - online and partial r/l
[21:56] <panda^> i never had a mommy in r/l
[21:57] <{sonja}JP> hmmmmm - Yes, i have wondered about that....
[21:57] <panda^> had an aunt who was a cargiver
[21:57] <{sonja}JP> i am sorry panda
[21:57] <panda^> is ok sonja
[21:57] <ravenshad> I'm sorry to hear that panda...
[21:57] <panda^> s'ok ravenshad
[21:57] <panda^> Mistress is doing a wonderful job at present and we are working on it
[21:58] <ravenshad> do you think there is a certain amount of role play involved in any bdsm relationship? (possibly in the area of general play sessions)
[21:58] <panda^> never had a dad either, had an uncle who worked ALL the time
[21:58] <panda^> yes
[21:58] <ravenshad> where panda?
[21:58] <{sonja}JP> oh yes - there is role play in any relationship - usually - just not always as defined
[21:59] <ravenshad> ok..where sonja? or an example please
[21:59] <panda^> a Dom is always a Dom but not always in total control in most relationships in r/l
[21:59] <{sonja}JP> {sitting in spotlight - thinking}
[21:59] * Ron1962 thinks....No...I dont think so.......or rather it doesnt have to be considered role play...when one of the children comes to me I wear the Daddy hat.....looking at things from that perspective......
[21:59] <panda^> and a sub might have to be in control in r/l at times
[22:00] <{sonja}JP> is that role play or simply variations of YOU?
[22:00] <panda^> we all have our r/l roles to play
[22:00] <ravenshad> I don't consider that role play panda...that is just being human and living one's life...
[22:00] <panda^> it's me sonja but it's a role i play too
[22:01] <{sonja}JP> like i said earlier, i role played vanilla for YEARS
[22:01] <panda^> it's a hat i wear
[22:01] <ravenshad> bineg sub is a role for you panda?
[22:01] * Ron1962 sighs...Well better to see you for a few minutes than not at all
[22:01] <ravenshad> being even..
[22:01] <panda^> i'd say no to that raven as being sub is my first love
[22:01] <{sonja}JP> seriously - i acted a certain way (contrary to what i wanted) cause i couldnt be submissive to my husband
[22:01] <ravenshad> that would be enacting a role sonja..
[22:02] <{sonja}JP> as opposed to role Playing? - ok - makes sense
[22:02] <panda^> when given the opportunity to do so subbing is my love
[22:02] <ravenshad> I see panda
[22:03] <panda^> when i have to be in control of things that is a role to me
[22:03] <ravenshad> for me, being a submissive is always there..has always been there...even when I am in a situation where I am in control..it does not change the fact that I am submissive...
[22:03] <panda^> and one i do not like to play
[22:03] * Ron1962 nods.....
[22:03] * LAR^ would say being a sub is something one is or is not. SUBMITTING is an active action, and that one does by choice
[22:03] <{sonja}JP> but it changes the actions you have to do
[22:04] <ravenshad> being in control of something does not make a person less of a submissive panda...
[22:04] <panda^> yes it does sonja
[22:04] <{sonja}JP> i would agree with Lar
[22:04] <ravenshad> well said Lar.. :)
[22:04] <panda^> true raven it just makes that one act differently than they would prefer
[22:04] * Ron1962 listens to his little ...ok younger brother
[22:05] <ravenshad> for example, as a mom, I am in control ...I have to be...but I don't just "play mommy"....I am still a submissive, but I know that any acts of submitting to my children, would be really wrong..
[22:05] <ravenshad> be well AB :)
[22:05] <{sonja}JP> oh definitely
[22:05] <panda^> very true raven
[22:05] <panda^> mommy is not a submitting role
[22:05] <panda^> it's a Domme role
[22:05] <{sonja}JP> not at all
[22:05] <LAR^> LOL, younger by a few hours. But I would also point out, elle is collared to me. She WILL submit to me, but does not always feel submissive. It is up to me to TAKE and keep the control.
[22:06] <Ron1962> Night AB
[22:06] <ravenshad> it is not a domme role either in reality panda...it is a parenting thing...
[22:06] * Ron1962 nods.....Thats part of you LAR...to take that control....
[22:06] <panda^> that is ok raven......i know what you mean
[22:06] <{sonja}JP> Master's ears perked - He says He has the same "problem" with me...
[22:06] <{sonja}JP> i think i was just called a brat!
[22:06] <panda^> lol sonja
[22:07] <ravenshad> I can see how being a submissive in a situation that requires the sub be in control can feel like a "role" the sub has to play...
[22:07] <ravenshad> LOL sonja
[22:07] * Ron1962 chuckles....Really {sonja}JP?......how veyr unusual.....LOL
[22:07] <{sonja}JP> He knows He loves having to take that control....
[22:07] <LAR^> sonja, that is what happens when one takes a strong and intelligent woman to sub
[22:07] <{sonja}JP> Exactly
[22:07] <panda^> i enjoy being with and caring for children as you know raven but i do see it as a role for me as i have none of my own
[22:08] <ravenshad> ok panda..
[22:08] <LAR^> And the worse thing you can say is: Just do what I say and nobody will get hurt <G>
[22:08] <ravenshad> lets get back on the topic of role play scenes.. :)
[22:08] <panda^> i'd rather be submitting to Mistress
[22:08] <{sonja}JP> okeeday raven
[22:09] <ravenshad> the area of what feels like a role and what doesn't feel that way vs. is it really a role, is far too individual to really discus...
[22:09] <panda^> nods
[22:09] <{sonja}JP> true
[22:09] <LAR^> Role play, vs intensification of what we really are?
[22:09] <{sonja}JP> he is good...
[22:09] <panda^> something like that LAR^
[22:10] <ravenshad> ok, maybe I'm having a brain fart..but what do you mean Lar?
[22:12] <LAR^> OK, to me the only real role playing I may do is ageplay. Otherwise any play that I do in BDSM, even when assuming a persona is just an intensification of the rolse we already share in real life. That make any sense, or did I just talk in a circle?
[22:12] <panda^> makes a lot of sense to me
[22:12] * Ron1962 hands LAR a compass
[22:13] <ravenshad> it makes sense...but then I have to wonder, if assuming the role of a rapist, interrogator, doctor, or such..would then not be role play to you?
[22:13] * LAR^ notes no matter which way he turns it points at Raven
[22:13] <ravenshad> I think we define role play differently Lar.. :)
[22:13] <{sonja}JP> but even in age play - couldnt you still say that it is "the child in you?
[22:13] <Ron1962> Yeah that makes sense......letting one aspect shine brighter than the others.....for we all have different aspects in ourselves.....
[22:13] <panda^> yes sonja
[22:14] <panda^> stop and think how many hats one wears each day
[22:14] * Ron1962 blinks........hands LAR a real compass....Errr...thats my sexy monitor......
[22:14] <LAR^> I thought about that while I was typing, just where the going in circles part came from. But here is the thing with that, I was an actor for a lot of years. Even the emotions of those roles I assume come from within me. Unless, I was to go so far as to create a history for the characther (What I do on stage). I won't do that in BDSM, it is too dangerous.
[22:14] <panda^> lol Ron1962
[22:14] <{sonja}JP> perhaps - for our discussion - we could say that role play was any "scene" where we are in a role that is not one of our everyday roles?
[22:14] <{sonja}JP> lol Ron
[22:14] <LAR^> That definition would work better
[22:15] <panda^> agreed sonja
[22:15] <ravenshad> I don't agree..sorry
[22:15] <panda^> i can see where you are coming from LAR^ and i agree
[22:15] <panda^> dont agree with what raven?
[22:15] <ravenshad> because basically then..there is no "role playing" at all..everyone has the potential to be anything at any time in a regular day...
[22:16] <ravenshad> that definition of role play..it is far too generalized..completely erases "role play"
[22:16] <ravenshad> lets see..what roles do I take every day.
[22:16] <ravenshad> interrogator: trying to get the truth out of one of my kids
[22:16] <{sonja}JP> ah - i see
[22:16] <panda^> i see doing things i have to do but dont like as role play
[22:16] <ravenshad> doctor/nurse: taking care of an injury or boo boo
[22:16] <ravenshad> accountant: pay the bills and balance the checkbook
[22:16] <LAR^> Of course they do, the key word there being POTENTIAL. Every man is a potential rapist. We don't for whatever reason. Be it fear, morals or emotion. But the POTENTIAL is there
[22:16] * EZRiser chuckles .. mission impossible
[22:16] <ravenshad> chef: cook any meal
[22:17] <ravenshad> even the more dangerous roles of "rapist"...can be applied to any human being the honestly explores thier dark side..
[22:17] <{sonja}JP> ok - i was going for - not mommy/daddy or whatever your job is
[22:17] <panda^> nods to raven
[22:17] <ravenshad> so if you enact a role play scene, you are acting out the role of a rapist....you are not just intensifying who you already are Lar...
[22:17] <LAR^> When one considers that rape is not about sex, but about power i agree Raven
[22:18] <{sonja}JP> ah - which is why i think the rape fantasy is so appealing to subs/Doms
[22:18] <panda^> exactly sonja
[22:18] <ravenshad> yes..that is what the major appeal is about rape scenes..
[22:18] <LAR^> But I am Raven, I am taking control. In the role of the rapist. But the actions are mind. The only TRUE role play IMHO is in the mind.
[22:18] <panda^> the power exchange
[22:19] * Ron1962 listens
[22:19] <panda^> role play is in our minds first LAR^
[22:19] <{sonja}JP> <------confused
[22:19] <ravenshad> then why role play at all, if there is no desire to pretent to be someone you aren't for a while? if it all comes down to who is in control, then role play would not be neccessary because any sub knows who is in control...
[22:19] <ravenshad> me too sonja...there is more to role play than control and who holds the power...
[22:20] <{sonja}JP> the overwhelming - total control - of a rape scene is not something we get everday - least i dont...
[22:20] <panda^> no
[22:21] <{sonja}JP> Master is in charge - sure - but He doesnt TAKE CHARGE constantly or with complete force often
[22:21] <ravenshad> isn't it the entire scene itself that attracts people? the words spoken, the actions in the scene, the costumes, the whole "fantasy"? not just who is in control?
[22:21] <panda^> yes raven
[22:21] <LAR^> OK, I can see where I seem to be contradicting everybody. Role Play or acting out a scene gives one permission to do things. But I would suggest that we are changing the scene, rather than who we are. Changing the rules under very specific circumstances if you will
[22:21] <ravenshad> true sonja...I'm not just talking rape scene however..and am pretty sure that people drawn to age play are not drawn to that particular role play just to feel the control of the mom or dad..
[22:22] <panda^> there's a need that draws one in those directions i think raven
[22:22] <{sonja}JP> boy - funny - i think we are all fairly well in agreement - but cant seem to connect to each other - weird
[22:23] <ravenshad> where I disagree is that there aren't any roles because role play is nothing more than intensifying what we already are...I thought the whole idea was to pretend to be someone else for a while...
[22:24] <panda^> but maybe that someone else is REALLY part of who we really are????
[22:24] <{sonja}JP> do you often play a role that is abhorrent to you?
[22:24] <panda^> i dont
[22:24] <ravenshad> I tend to lack the imagination to actually role play sonja, as i said before, I've never done a role play scene...so I can't really answer that..
[22:25] <{sonja}JP> that didnt come out right
[22:25] <ravenshad> but, on the grounds where you played the role of "vanilla" for years..I can say i played the role of doormat for a while..and hated every minute of it..but did it anyway..so as such, yes I guess I can play a role that is abhorrent to me..
[22:25] * Ron1962 nods....But we all have a bit of all of the facets......Coudl you imagine me as a submissive raven?....niether could I....but I could play one...for a little while.....
[22:25] <{sonja}JP> ok - in role play (i think) we are acting out roles that we arent in every day - but we have a fascination for
[22:25] <ravenshad> or fantasy about sonja...
[22:26] <{sonja}JP> huh?
[22:26] <ravenshad> as fascination for, or fantasy about..I was just adding something to your statement..
[22:26] <panda^> Ron1962 as i can be Domme for a while but i abhor it
[22:26] <panda^> it's not ME
[22:26] * LAR^ would agree in the sense that I believe that within role play, we are giving ourselves PERMISSION to be or behave in a way that for various reasons we can be or do in R/L. Be it ageplay or rape play
[22:27] <{sonja}JP> oh - see, i dont think i could REALLY role play a role that is totally NOT me
[22:27] <ravenshad> yes..Ron, and that would be you playing a role of someone that is not YOU..hence I find it difficult to agree with Lar's statement earlier that there are no "roles" people can play...
[22:27] <ravenshad> ok..that makes sense Lar and that I agree with..
[22:28] <Ron1962> Could role play help a person grow?.........even say role play on IRC?....I started out here in a sense......
[22:29] <panda^> i think so Ron1962
[22:29] <ravenshad> I guess so Ron...
[22:29] <{sonja}JP> Master says we got off on a tangent.....that role play is either a game or not, if it is not, then it is somthing other than role play
[22:29] <ravenshad> thanks sonja..that is what I was trying to say...
[22:30] <ravenshad> thanks JP
[22:30] <Ron1962> Well Said JP
[22:30] <{sonja}JP> Jase is leaving Ron to the "girls" - you are on your own now....
[22:31] <ravenshad> I do understand how role play can be an intensification of who we already are..and how just about any role exists inside every person...
[22:31] <Ron1962> Oh Great Jase...leave me alone with these girls......*Ron perks*
[22:31] * ravenshad can't find the words...sorry..
[22:32] <{sonja}JP> i get you raven - but there is role play - ie - doctor nurse or there is something other than role play - which i cant find the word for
[22:32] <ravenshad> but, the line would be at actually acting out a role...becoming for a short time, another person..not yourself..
[22:32] <ravenshad> yes!
[22:32] <ravenshad> whew..someone found the words..thanks sonja :)
[22:33] <ravenshad> when I think of role play, I think of scenes like the boss with a naughty secretary...an interrogation or a rape fantasy...
[22:33] <{sonja}JP> the "other" is a whole differnt ball game
[22:33] <{sonja}JP> right
[22:33] * Ron1962 thinks....Perhaps there is role play as in the doctor nurse....and perhaps there is the streaching of limits....doing something you wouldnt ordinarily do to see how it feels......but is still in character......
[22:33] <ravenshad> I can see where intensifying "control" is part of every role play scene..
[22:33] <{sonja}JP> ooohh there is one of my favs - boss/secretary
[22:34] <Ron1962> Naughty Secretary?......errr.....do you take dicktation raven?
[22:34] <ravenshad> but, so is the acting of the role itself...acting as the angry boss...the flustered secretary...you see?
[22:34] <{sonja}JP> lol
[22:34] <Ron1962> whoops...sorry for the Freudian typo
[22:34] * ravenshad giggles..oh yeah Ron...every night actually.. LOL
[22:34] <{sonja}JP> uh yeah right Ron
[22:34] <{sonja}JP> typo = sure
[22:35] * panda^ reads all the jabbering and smiles
[22:35] <panda^> school girl/Principal
[22:35] * Ron1962 sighs....so misunderstood....and lowers his head to hide the grin
[22:35] <ravenshad> I thikn you might be on to something with that stretching of limits thing Ron...that would not be role play, that would be an intensification of who/what the people involved already are...
[22:35] <{sonja}JP> <------- short enough to have caught it...
[22:35] <ravenshad> yes panda...that is a role play scene..
[22:36] <Thundernt> Thanks, my server is being a pain.
[22:36] <ravenshad> I hate when that happens Thundernt, it drive me nuts :(
[22:36] * Ron1962 hands Thundernt a crop to whip the bad ISP with
[22:36] <panda^> ooooooooooo
[22:36] <{sonja}JP> crop?
[22:37] <{sonja}JP> *perks*
[22:37] <Thundernt> ranenshad, thanks but I prefer my single tail. S~
[22:37] * Ron1962 watches as a cold wind seems to pass through all the ladies.....
[22:37] * panda^ gave Mistress a nice crop this last time
[22:37] <ravenshad> ummm...I didn't give you a crop..Ron did.. :)
[22:37] * ravenshad giggles..
[22:37] <Ron1962> LOL raven
[22:37] <panda^> oops
[22:37] <{sonja}JP> i just gave Master a nice flogger :-)
[22:37] <ravenshad> ok...lets see...anything else about role play someone wants to cover?
[22:38] <panda^> Mistress has so many toys that she cant lift her bag
[22:38] <Ron1962> LOL.....See you next week {sonja}JP......LOL
[22:38] <{sonja}JP> did we cover anything?
[22:38] <{sonja}JP> um - that was thursday - i meant i bought Him one....
[22:38] <{sonja}JP> lol Ron
[22:38] <ravenshad> we covered lots of stuff sonja :)
[22:38] <Ron1962> Yeah that we all have some slightly different ideas about role play
[22:38] <ravenshad> LOL Ron
[22:38] <{sonja}JP> hmmmmmmmm - but maybe i Should go....
[22:38] <panda^> yes Ron1962
[22:38] <{sonja}JP> exactly - but thats ok
[22:39] <ravenshad> well..we never did discuss the general things needed/desired for a role play scene..like LM had started..the costumes and such...
[22:39] <panda^> i have yet to meet anyone in D/s who has the exact same idea of what it is as anyone else
[22:39] <ravenshad> yes it is ok sonja..there isn't much discussion if everyone has the same ideas.. :)
[22:39] <Ron1962> Ohhh...costumes...Yes....must have disposable clothing.....
[22:39] <{sonja}JP> or old
[22:39] <ravenshad> do you think the clothing worn (or not worn) for a role play scene enhance the scene?
[22:39] <{sonja}JP> - dont tell Him i told yall this....
[22:40] <panda^> yes it does
[22:40] <Ron1962> I like the word disposable....cause I like ripping them off.....LOL
[22:40] <ravenshad> such as for boss/secretary..would it help the scene if the boss wore a suit, the secrtary a nice work type dress or skirt set?
[22:40] <{sonja}JP> never mind
[22:40] <panda^> it helps put one in the mind set
[22:40] <{sonja}JP> definitely
[22:40] <ravenshad> what sonja?
[22:40] <{sonja}JP> both people
[22:40] * Ron1962 nods....Yes.....would help set the mood.....
[22:40] <ravenshad> you can say something..I just wanted to finish my thought before my mind lost it somewhere.. LOL
[22:40] <panda^> whatcha gonna tell us sonja????
[22:40] <{sonja}JP> both for wearing the clothes and seeing the clothes
[22:41] <ravenshad> I have to agree that the clothes would help the scene..
[22:41] <Ron1962> ana doesnt understand the need for role play......but thats just her.....
[22:41] <panda^> oh they do lots
[22:41] <{sonja}JP> oh - i was just gonna say that - never mind - i realized it is something i shouldnt say
[22:41] <panda^> in my case anyways
[22:41] * ravenshad hands the discussion to Ron so she can go potty..brb
[22:41] <panda^> who is ana?
[22:42] <ravenshad> ana is ayli
[22:42] <ravenshad> brb
[22:42] <panda^> kimmie?
[22:42] <Ron1962> anathyn.......She lives here as well......
[22:42] <{sonja}JP> is that why she is not here tonight?
[22:42] * panda^ waves to kimmie
[22:42] <Ron1962> What about props?....would a big desk help with the pricipal school girl....secratary /boss scene?
[22:42] <ravenshad> ana grabs the keyboard..
[22:42] <panda^> yep prolly would
[22:43] <{sonja}JP> helps - but not necessay
[22:43] <Ron1962> Tow puters....
[22:43] <{sonja}JP> necessary even
[22:43] * panda^ hugs da kimmers tight
[22:43] <Ron1962> two even
[22:43] <{sonja}JP> tow them where?
[22:43] <ravenshad> <ana> no I'm not skipping the discussion because of that.. I fell asleep..
[22:43] <{sonja}JP> i too phunny
[22:43] <ravenshad> <ana> just woke up.. Hi panda.. *hugs*
[22:43] <panda^> raven works you too hard kimmers???
[22:44] <elle{LDS}> :))))
[22:44] <Ron1962> LOL panda
[22:44] <ravenshad> <ana> no panda.
[22:45] <panda^> was j/k kimmers
[22:45] <Ron1962> Ok......So props are nice....but not nessicary....what would you think might be nessisary?
[22:45] * panda^ gives raven a hug and a smooch
[22:45] <elle{LDS}> a very creative mind :)
[22:45] <ravenshad> <ana> smile, probably it would be neccasary to have certain props.. just not.. ALL of them..
[22:45] <{sonja}JP> depends on how good the couple is at "getting into it"
[22:45] <panda^> props help but the mindset is most important
[22:45] <elle{LDS}> perhaps...creating the setting before starting the scene...?
[22:45] <{sonja}JP> right - some would need very little - others would need a lot
[22:46] <ravenshad> <ana nods
[22:46] * Ron1962 nods.....Like I would like the big desk.....hehehehehe...make it that much easier to bend the vict....errr...the submisive over it
[22:46] <panda^> lol Ron1962
[22:46] <ravenshad> <ana laughs
[22:46] <{sonja}JP> simple doctor/nurse boss/sec. might only need clothes...
[22:47] <panda^> i doubt Ron1962 needs a desk to bend someone over tho....he has a knee i'm sure
[22:47] <{sonja}JP> nother Freudian slip ron?
[22:47] <Ron1962> Oh no {sonja}JP.....would need the gynocological chair too.....LOL...never mind...was a visual I had......LOL
[22:47] <{sonja}JP> ROFLMAO
[22:47] <panda^> o geez
[22:47] <panda^> now he's a doc
[22:47] <ravenshad> *ana opes her eyes wide.. gods.. explain that to the kids
[22:47] * Ron1962 looks at {sonja}JP and tries out his best innocent look
[22:48] <{sonja}JP> sonja has 2 boys - it doesnt work
[22:48] <panda^> lol ana
[22:48] <ravenshad> *ana laughs..
[22:48] <Ron1962> Ohhh....good thought ana.....that would be a bit hard to explain wouldnt it....LOL
[22:48] <panda^> nods
[22:48] <{sonja}JP> you could use a hairdressers shampoo chair...
[22:49] <ravenshad> <ana> yes, it would be very hard to explain.. "Daddy, whats that chair? uhhhhh.. nuffin.. really.. GO back to your room!"
[22:49] <Ron1962> Drats......thought I could fool ya with the innocent look...somehow no one ever seems to believe I am innocent as the driven snow.....
[22:49] <{sonja}JP> used to have one of those myself...
[22:49] <panda^> nope Ron1962 cuz yer not
[22:49] <{sonja}JP> b/c we have iqs over 50
[22:49] <panda^> lol sonja
[22:49] <ravenshad> laughs
[22:49] * Ron1962 sighs...and realizes that this is a tough crowd.......
[22:50] <Ron1962> Would you believe the snow on the side of a country road?
[22:50] <ravenshad> <ana> we love you Ron.. but.. uhmmmmmmm.. anyone that has known you fifteen minutes knows your not innocent.. nice roleplay though :)
[22:50] <panda^> maybe
[22:50] * elle{LDS} laughs suddenly, loudly, and off timing...
[22:50] <Ron1962> Would you believe the snow on the side of a an inner sity intersection?
[22:50] <{sonja}JP> i was just thinking that...
[22:50] <Ron1962> Would you believe the snow on the side of a Major highway?
[22:50] <{sonja}JP> about the role play raven
[22:50] * elle{LDS} coughs, "oh...sorry...thought i was supposed to be laughing..."
[22:50] <elle{LDS}> :)
[22:50] <panda^> s'ok elle{LDS}
[22:51] <ravenshad> <ana> raven is still afk actually, it's kimmie/ana/ayli
[22:51] <{sonja}JP> Master says i never get the "innocent" school girl right......very NOT ME
[22:51] * Ron1962 smiles at elle{LDS}....and hugs her again
[22:51] <{sonja}JP> oh - ok ana *s*
[22:51] <ravenshad> <ana> I can't do innocent either.. wonder why
[22:51] <panda^> me either ana....NO WAY
[22:51] <panda^> i tell MIstress panda is a GOOD bear but she dont buy it
[22:52] * panda^ shrugs
[22:52] <Ron1962> Cause we know you ana........and your eyes give you away....cause while your pretending innocents the litle lights in your eyes are saying the kinkiest things
[22:52] <{sonja}JP> i tried to tell Him i was shy and demure once also - He was so rude - He fell off His chair laughing
[22:52] <Ron1962> LOL.....I knew I liked JP
[22:52] <ravenshad> <ana RON~!!!!
[22:52] <panda^> oh no sonja
[22:52] <ravenshad> <ana I am not thinking.. well.. uhmmm.. maybe I am
[22:52] * Ron1962 laughs at ana
[22:52] <Ron1962> Yes you are.......
[22:52] * Corgan listens
[22:53] <panda^> ana do u have a pic sis?
[22:53] <ravenshad> <ana grins
[22:53] <ravenshad> <ana> not on this computer
[22:53] <panda^> i'd like one if and when ya can
[22:53] <ravenshad> <ana> raven's back.. *HUGS* bbl :)
[22:53] <panda^> i have a new one also
[22:54] <panda^> bye ana
[22:54] * ravenshad returns
[22:54] <panda^> wb ravenshad
[22:54] <Corgan> wb raven
[22:54] * Ron1962 nods.....What other type of role scenes can you imagine?...the boss/secratary....the school girl/principla.....the cop/thief.....what else?
[22:55] <{sonja}JP> totally blank mind......
[22:55] <ravenshad> thanks all..
[22:55] <elle{LDS}> interrogator/prisoner, rapist/rape-ee
[22:55] <Ron1962> WB little raven
[22:55] <ravenshad> ty big Ron
[22:55] <panda^> judge/defendant
[22:55] * Ron1962 smiles......
[22:55] <{sonja}JP> ooooh - Big Ron?
[22:55] <Ron1962> Ohhh...nice one panda
[22:55] <ravenshad> guard/prisoner (that one gets done alot)
[22:55] <elle{LDS}> and then perhaps that of animals with their trainers (ponies, doggies, etc etc)
[22:55] <{sonja}JP> there i go again - talkin out loud...
[22:55] <ravenshad> yes elle..
[22:56] <{sonja}JP> guard/prisoner - really?
[22:56] <{sonja}JP> i mean done a lot?
[22:56] <ravenshad> well..those bad b movies...female prison movies..
[22:56] * ravenshad giggles
[22:56] <Ron1962> How about two teenagers......first time thing?
[22:56] <ravenshad> could be done Ron..
[22:56] <{sonja}JP> we did that for real....
[22:57] <elle{LDS}> one thing that should be discussed...and i dunno if this has been...is the psychological ramifications of more "edgy" role play...such as along the lines of rape/prisoner/kidnapping, etc
[22:57] <Ron1962> Or the popular variation of a rape...date rape.....
[22:57] <{sonja}JP> that is "walking down memory lane
[22:57] <ravenshad> I think a role play scene requires imagination..and because of that, the combinations are probably endless...
[22:57] <elle{LDS}> esp since there are a lot of players out there who seek to make that type of roleplay as close to reality as possible
[22:57] <Ron1962> Well....that and a lot of duct tape raven
[22:57] <panda^> we did talk about it elle{LDS}
[22:57] <Corgan> lol
[22:57] <{sonja}JP> you need to hide all that duct tape raven.....
[22:58] <{sonja}JP> that stuff leaves icky residue...
[22:58] <ravenshad> yes elle...we discussed it..the possibility of bringing out past abuse, the possibility of getting "lost" in the roles...the possibility of outside interference..
[22:58] <Ron1962> LOL......Bet you she will buy duct tape now {sonja}JP
[22:58] <ravenshad> I will sonja :)
[22:58] <Ron1962> Oh drats
[22:58] <{sonja}JP> gotcha
[22:58] <elle{LDS}> damn...missed that part. bummer.
[22:58] <Ron1962> LAR was here...should be a log of it if LAR keeps logs
[22:58] <panda^> raven has the log elle{LDS}
[22:58] <{sonja}JP> ropes Ron - ropes - soft ones for the most part
[22:59] <ravenshad> well elle, feel free to give your opinion of the edgier role plays..what you think needs to be done when setting one up..what possible after affects are there..
[22:59] <panda^> i am having a lot of trouble finding soft cotton rope
[22:59] <ravenshad> the log will be posted on the website.. :)
[22:59] <{sonja}JP> try belts
[22:59] * Ron1962 nods...Got that {sonja}JP....and velcro handcuffs........and suspension handcuffs too....and ankle cuffs and.....oh my...you would think I was kinky or something
[22:59] <ravenshad> Lar wasn't here for the rape scene discussion Ron..
[22:59] <elle{LDS}> oh goodness...trouble? try wal-mart...
[22:59] <elle{LDS}> heck, they've the best rope there for making clothespin zippers
[23:00] * ravenshad thinks about making it a hard limit that Ron is not allowed to go to wal mart..<giggle>
[23:01] <ravenshad> well, we've reached the time limit for the discussion nights...shall we end it here?
[23:01] <panda^> ours dont have it
[23:02] * elle{LDS} always gets ropes at wal-mart...and the stores are cookie-cutter
[23:02] <elle{LDS}> you gotta know where to look for it at wal mart.
[23:02] <panda^> usually but the only rope i found was boating stuff even in the place where clothesline was
[23:02] <panda^> ok where
[23:02] <elle{LDS}> try the camping sections...or in hardware (not where clothesline would be)
[23:02] <elle{LDS}> i know that here the ropes are in camping
[23:02] <panda^> i have a friend in fla who makes macrame' handcuffs
[23:03] <ravenshad> Next week's topic is D/s without S/m...(END OF DISCUSSION FOR LOGGING PURPOSES)
[21:03] * ravenshad says Hello and welcome to leather and roses' weekly discussions on BDSM the following rules apply..
[21:03] <ravenshad> you must be of legal age to participate, if you are not, please leave. Legal age being 18 or 21 depending on your location
[21:03] <ravenshad> no trolling will be tolerated, this is not a singles night, it is a discussion night
[21:04] <ravenshad> trolling is the advertisement of yourself, your wants needs or desires for the purpose of finding a partner or date.
[21:04] <ravenshad> be polite when speaking and do not flame anyone. You can disagree with an idea, but do not attack the person making the idea. Flamers, will be kicked
[21:04] <ravenshad> all statements are publishable on the web site, with nicks changed (at your request, email webmaster@leathernroses.com if you don't want your nick used.) If an email request is not recieved, that will be taken as consent to post the log in it's entirety using the nicknames.
[21:04] <ravenshad> Tonight's topic is Role Playing In BDSM...let's start with this one...what is role playing?
[21:06] <Ron1962> Role Play......the taking on of an assumed Identity or the playing out of a set of fictional circumstances....IE. Ron I moved the couch by myself.....
[21:07] <ravenshad> role playing, is the assuming of a character or something that is not your true identity...in my opinion anyway...
[21:07] <Thundernt> Role playing is just that playing a role. It could be a jail scene, an interrogation, just about anything one enjoys.
[21:07] <ravenshad> ok..some people consider all of BDSM to be role playing..that one assumes the role of a dom or a sub..what are your thoughts on this?
[21:08] <{sonja}JP> i dont think so.....
[21:08] <ravenshad> why not sonja?
[21:08] <{sonja}JP> lemme rephrase...i dont think so if it is 24/7
[21:08] <EZRiser> ignorance is bliss ... and some ppl stay in heaven ..
[21:08] * Ron1962 chuckles....If you feel Dom or sub all the time acting vanilla is role play is it not?
[21:08] <Ron1962> LOL EZRiser
[21:08] <{sonja}JP> i would agree...
[21:09] <Thundernt> in my opinion, one is either dominant or submissive or a mixture of. It is what one is, I believe it is the core essence of ones personality.
[21:09] <{sonja}JP> i think if it is something you do just for fun, then it could be considered a role playing thing
[21:09] <{sonja}JP> but if it is the way you live your life...then it isnt a role it is your life
[21:10] * Ron1962 nods.....Yes for some of us it is.....for others the Dom or sub side is shrouded with the "niceties" that society calls polite behaviour......LOL...I am getting over that.....
[21:10] <ravenshad> core essence of one's personality..I can agree with that Thundernt quite easily...
[21:11] <ravenshad> as well sonja, I agree that in a 24/7 being dominant or submissive is not a role that is assumed..it is who/what the people are..
[21:11] <ravenshad> so if being dominant or submissive is not just role playing at BDSM, in a lifestyle relationship, then what constitutes role play wihtin BDSM?
[21:12] <{sonja}JP> i think it might get confused by - forexample - i am not "submissive" with others - just One - so some might see that as putting on a role with Him - though it isnt
[21:12] <Thundernt> I live a 24/7... I am also very active in the Dallas area. It is my lifestyle, not something I play on the week end.
[21:12] <Ron1962> The acting out of scenes?
[21:12] <EZRiser> assuming an identy for a scene or session that is out of your ordinary character ..
[21:13] * Ron1962 nods...Well said EZRiser
[21:13] <{sonja}JP> is it role playing if one is acting out a scene but with their normal personality?
[21:13] <EZRiser> no its not
[21:14] <{sonja}JP> what is that?
[21:14] <Thundernt> in my view role play would be taking on the identity of a police officer during an interrogation scene.
[21:14] <EZRiser> they would be admitting to themselves & their partner what or who they are ..
[21:15] <{sonja}JP> but if you are still a "dominant" police officer.....
[21:15] <ravenshad> I agree Thundernt
[21:16] <Thundernt> sonja.. there are many roles and true as a dominant I would play the dominant role. but a switch might decide to play a submissive role when generally they are in top space.
[21:16] <ravenshad> but if he is not a police officer in real life, then he is acting the "role" of a police officer...
[21:17] <{sonja}JP> thats what i was asking before...
[21:17] <Ron1962> But what if I wanted to play a punishment scene?.....but my submissive had done nothing to warrent such a scene....would that not be role play in a sense EZRiser?
[21:17] <{sonja}JP> i thought it was getting around to you have to change personalities to be role playing
[21:18] <ravenshad> I think to a certain extent you have to, kind of like acting..say someone wants to do an interrogation scene, yet their inherent personality is not the same as an interrogator would be...then they would have to "act" like an interrogator...
[21:18] <ravenshad> I'm not sure that made any sense..
[21:18] <Ron1962> Yeah it did ravenshad
[21:18] <EZRiser> I dont think so Ron .. thats just a different type or variation of a scene
[21:19] <{sonja}JP> i got it
[21:19] <Ron1962> Ok EZRiser....thought it was applicable
[21:19] <ravenshad> like a rapte fantasy scene..the male may not have any real desire to rape a woman, and would never do such a thing..but he must act like he thinks a rapist would, make it as "real" as possible for the sub...thus, changing his personality..
[21:20] <{sonja}JP> that was the thought i had earlier - but it seemed to complicated.
[21:20] <ravenshad> speaking of personality, could doing certain role play scenes, like an interrogation scene or rape scene, cause a person's inherent personality to change? to have some difficulty dropping the role
[21:20] * ravenshad nods..I understand that sonja..
[21:20] <LadyMist> but does it really change his personality? or is it just as an actor tores to 'be' the character...
[21:20] <{sonja}JP> oh goodness......maybe if they did it too long...
[21:20] <ravenshad> I think it's the actor trying to be the character LM..
[21:21] <{sonja}JP> but i played the vanilla role for years......didnt change me :-)
[21:21] <LadyMist> I think maybe if they were to become that way normally...
[21:21] <panda^> if one kept the role indefinitely it might change his personality
[21:21] <LadyMist> ie IF I were tending to be a rapist...pretending to be one would open the door...
[21:21] <{sonja}JP> eventually a true personality surfaces....
[21:21] <panda^> very true LadyMist
[21:21] <LadyMist> agreed
[21:21] <ravenshad> yes LM..
[21:21] <{sonja}JP> that makes sense
[21:22] <panda^> as a Master who might have abusive tendencies would turn into one
[21:22] <ravenshad> so then could we say, when it comes to role play scenes, one has to take into consideration that it may take some time for the participants to completely "lose" the role and be themselves again?
[21:22] <LadyMist> I might want want to be a sadist but nothing but the character trait can 'make' me take pleasure in anothers pain...
[21:22] <panda^> an abuser that is
[21:22] <EZRiser> then the person's personality would also dictate their preference in the types of scenes they get involved it ..
[21:22] <LadyMist> yes EZ
[21:23] <LadyMist> I don't think it would take time...
[21:23] <LadyMist> unless it was too close to home...
[21:23] <LadyMist> to natural so to speak...
[21:23] <panda^> right
[21:23] <ravenshad> Ahh yes EZ...but then, in the case where the sub needs or craves a particular scene, would the dominant try it to "please" the sub, maybe as a reward?
[21:23] <ravenshad> could be LM..
[21:23] <LadyMist> I would... and do try on new 'clothes' to reward a sub...
[21:24] * Ron1962 nods to LadyMist....True.....I can and have "played " a rapist........but slipping out of that character was a....relief
[21:24] <ravenshad> it is not part of your normal personality Ron..
[21:24] <EZRiser> I could see a Dom doing that for his sub .. yes
[21:24] <LadyMist> I can either do it again... or not...depending on how much *I* liked it...
[21:24] <LadyMist> or the ease with which I could do it for her...
[21:24] * Ron1962 grumbles......and scratches out rapist as a possible carrer move.....
[21:24] <ravenshad> LOL Ron
[21:25] <EZRiser> and twice if you really liked it ..
[21:25] <panda^> heh Ron1962
[21:25] * LadyMist chuckles...
[21:25] <Ron1962> Oh well.....very little momey in raping anyway.....
[21:25] <ravenshad> that's a good point LM...the dominants comfort level has to be taken into consideration as well..
[21:25] <{sonja}JP> well thats a relief
[21:25] * LadyMist smiles...
[21:25] <ravenshad> ok Ron, be careful, someone might think you're serious.. LOL
[21:25] <ravenshad> so how does one set up a role play scene?
[21:25] <{sonja}JP> now......raping and pillaging....
[21:25] <{sonja}JP> you just have to be a viking...
[21:25] <LadyMist> the dominant who mentored me said " you don't know who is going to be lovely and persuasive" I think she borrowed it from Warren...
[21:26] * Ron1962 nods....Oh yes....there have been a role or two I have played that struck a powerful coard in me.......
[21:26] * ravenshad thinks of pirates and tavern wenches..
[21:26] <{sonja}JP> :-)
[21:26] <ravenshad> Yup..a viking would be interesting.. :)
[21:26] * LadyMist wags eyebrows suggestively...
[21:26] <ravenshad> which ones Ron?
[21:26] * ravenshad has never done a role play scene...
[21:27] <{sonja}JP> i wouldnt be terribly disappointed if you wanted to continue that "how to set up a role playing scene" with the fantasy rape idea
[21:27] <LadyMist> costumes...
[21:27] <ravenshad> OK..lets get specific...how would one go about setting up a fantasy rape scene?
[21:27] <{sonja}JP> oh goody - thanks raven
[21:27] <LadyMist> scholl girl clothes...
[21:27] <LadyMist> school even...
[21:27] <pbear^> we did it at Dreams to Reality in Omaha in Feb
[21:27] <EZRiser> all depends on where that scene would take place first
[21:28] <LadyMist> oh... 'notices we went on to rape...'
[21:28] <ravenshad> ok..costumes..for a fantasy rape scene..for the woman, clothes that could be torn or cut up ...hand me downs, or real old clothes..
[21:28] * Ron1962 smiles....The angry dom......I had spanked for play many times....but someone wanted a scene for punishment.....wanted it to be just for that...punishment....and when I did it I found that it fit very naturally....
[21:28] <LadyMist> yep... I hate getting stuff I like cut off...
[21:28] <ravenshad> sorry LM..being a bit more specific...we can get back to general ways in a moment..just remind me :)
[21:28] <LadyMist> s'ok...
[21:28] <ravenshad> ahhh..makes sense Ron.. :)
[21:29] * pbear^ nods to Ron1962
[21:29] <ravenshad> should such a scene be discussed at great length though before it is attempted?
[21:29] <{sonja}JP> what about a further game.....
[21:29] <{sonja}JP> way way discussed
[21:29] <{sonja}JP> for example......
[21:29] <LadyMist> depends on the sub and the dome...
[21:29] <EZRiser> it should be agreed upon .. but thats it ...
[21:29] <LadyMist> if they have known each other for a while and know the hot buttons and the cold one.s...
[21:29] <ravenshad> possible flashback triggers revealed..in the case of a sub who has been raped in the past..yet still craves such a scene..
[21:29] <pbear^> ravenshad when we did it...the sub wanted it to be a surprise but her Dom had told us of her fantasy of it......so it was pre planned first
[21:29] <EZRiser> it should come as a total surprise to the submissive
[21:29] <ravenshad> and a safeword to stop the scene if it overpowers the sub's emotions/mental capacity..
[21:29] <ravenshad> yes EZ
[21:29] <LadyMist> good way to relive and overcome the rape...
[21:29] <Ron1962> Depends on the scene.......I think a rape scene should not be discussed too much.....for is not part of it the suspense of what will happen to me next?
[21:30] <ravenshad> true LM...
[21:30] <ravenshad> yes LM
[21:30] <{sonja}JP> this is why i asked....Master and i were trying to set one up...
[21:30] * LadyMist listens...
[21:30] <LadyMist> what happened?
[21:30] <{sonja}JP> He was going to "abduct" me in a shopping mall parking lot....all He told me was that it would be one of three days...
[21:30] <ravenshad> I didn't say discuss the specifics of the scene..but the emotional mental impact of it..why the person wants it..stuff like that Ron...but one could discuss the many different posible actions in the scene, without saying this is exactly what will happen, thus perserving the suspense..
[21:31] * ravenshad listens to sonja..
[21:31] <LadyMist> did it go well for the both of you?
[21:31] <pbear^> this was done in a dungeon at a play party where there were many people around to help or stop it
[21:31] <{sonja}JP> before we ever said anything further.....i thought of this...if someone had seen Him doing that - there would be problems.....
[21:31] * Ron1962 nods,....Yeah....I can see that...or setting a time frame like JP & {sonja}JP have done
[21:31] <{sonja}JP> {imagining cop stopping Him}
[21:32] <{sonja}JP> havent done :-(
[21:32] <ravenshad> yup..that's a possibility in a "capture" scene...
[21:32] <Ron1962> Yikes.,.....a definete scene stopper {sonja}JP
[21:32] <LadyMist> would you fight enough to cause such a scene to draw that kind of notice?
[21:32] <{sonja}JP> so if it is not thouroughly discussed
[21:32] <pbear^> this gal did
[21:32] <pbear^> but she wanted it that way
[21:32] <Ron1962> How did it go panda?
[21:32] <{sonja}JP> no, but just the snatch could arouse a good Samaritan
[21:32] <pbear^> it went off just great Ron1962
[21:32] <ravenshad> I would think, and for me I know it is fact, the sub would fight as much as they would if they were truly attacked..to get into and stay in the "victim" mindset...to get that "reality" feeling of the scene..
[21:33] <{sonja}JP> exactly
[21:33] <pbear^> 5 took her down and undressed her first
[21:33] <ravenshad> true sonja..
[21:33] <{sonja}JP> i would want to
[21:33] <ravenshad> that's a gang rape :(
[21:33] <pbear^> no
[21:33] <LadyMist> maybe she wanted it that way...
[21:33] <Ron1962> Gang rapes can be fantasies too......
[21:33] <pbear^> then her Dom took over
[21:33] <ravenshad> true..I'm sorry forgive the :(...I was out of line with it..
[21:33] <ravenshad> ahh..I see..
[21:34] <pbear^> she is a big girl and he could not get her down alone but she wanted it that way
[21:34] <LadyMist> Milord can't without throttling me...
[21:34] <ravenshad> ahhh...I see..she wanted to be overpowered...
[21:34] <LadyMist> he taught me too much martial arts...
[21:34] <pbear^> yes ravenshad
[21:34] * LadyMist laughs
[21:34] * ravenshad giggles at LM...
[21:34] * Ron1962 makes a note not to tick LadyMist off......
[21:34] * Amax grins...
[21:34] <ravenshad> smart move Ron :)
[21:35] <pbear^> lol Ron1962
[21:35] <{sonja}JP> making same note
[21:35] <LadyMist> I think it would take a few people.... to take me down seriously...
[21:35] * LadyMist snorts...
[21:35] <ravenshad> it probably would..
[21:35] * ravenshad giggles
[21:35] <LadyMist> I don't hurts friends...
[21:35] <pbear^> it took 5 plus her Dom
[21:35] <LadyMist> especially those who laugh at my typos....
[21:35] <pbear^> hehe
[21:35] * Ron1962 smiles.....Well....to really struggle to "get into" the mindset....yeah it might take a few people.......
[21:35] <ravenshad> ok...so in her case, panda it was discussed with others before hand...but beyond the fact of her Dom telling her it would eventually happen, did they discuss it alot, or do you not know?
[21:36] <pbear^> she had asked for it but he did not tell her it was going to happen
[21:36] <pbear^> he got 5 of us together and asked us to help him do it
[21:36] <pbear^> she was taken totally by surprise
[21:36] <ravenshad> ok..so you wouldn't know whether or not they had discussed it before hand and what topics those discussions entailed..
[21:36] <ravenshad> yes..she would be...knowing it would happen..but not knowing when...
[21:37] <pbear^> i know she had it as a fantasy for a long time and he knew this
[21:37] <ravenshad> ok panda..
[21:37] <{sonja}JP> i think for that particular scene, that is the way it almost has to be done
[21:37] <ravenshad> yes sonja ..it is...
[21:37] <LadyMist> we didn't discuss it much other than... what he already knew...like my head hanging off the bed was a big NO...
[21:37] <pbear^> she is a switch and was in Domme mode when it happened
[21:37] * LadyMist shodders...
[21:37] <pbear^> oooooo
[21:37] <LadyMist> I feel for her... I would fight TWICE as hard...
[21:38] <pbear^> she was a bear to take down believe me
[21:38] <{sonja}JP> the balance between knowing enough to keep out of trouble and still keep it "real" enough to be fun
[21:38] <ravenshad> that is a difficult balance to find in such a scene..
[21:38] <pbear^> each of us had a limb and one undressed her
[21:38] <{sonja}JP> why we are struggling with it....
[21:38] <{sonja}JP> i wouldnt want the whole group thing - even just in the beg.
[21:39] <ravenshad> neither would I sonja...
[21:39] <pbear^> she wanted to be able to be real and fight
[21:39] <ravenshad> ok, lets get back to general stuff...
[21:39] * Ron1962 nods......I think a scene like a rape would for Me have to be a one on one thing
[21:39] <pbear^> nor would i
[21:39] <LadyMist> duck tape and a knife works well for solos...
[21:39] <ravenshad> true LM.. :)
[21:39] <pbear^> yes LM
[21:40] <{sonja}JP> we talked about chloroform *g*
[21:40] * Ron1962 perks and takes a note....duct tape.....knife...no wait straight razor......
[21:40] <{sonja}JP> discarded that quickly
[21:40] <ravenshad> that would be interesting...but possibly too dangerous...
[21:40] * LadyMist shivers delishiously...
[21:40] <Ron1962> Oh yes....no cloroform.....can give you a killer headache.......
[21:40] <{sonja}JP> right....needs expert advice...
[21:40] * ravenshad giggles..
[21:40] * LadyMist shudders at the spelling...
[21:40] <{sonja}JP> found that out
[21:40] <EZRiser> nitrous oxide .. they wouldnt care ..
[21:40] <{sonja}JP> lol
[21:40] <ravenshad> LOL EZ..true but kind of hard to get one's hands on..
[21:40] <Ron1962> LOL EZ
[21:40] <pbear^> very true EZRiser
[21:41] <LadyMist> that's NO fun...
[21:41] <pbear^> depends on where one works Ron1962
[21:41] <ravenshad> unless of course the sub or dom worked in an operating room or dentist's office.. :)
[21:41] <Ron1962> Ok general stuff
[21:41] <EZRiser> very easy to get hold of .. a can of reddiwhip is full of it
[21:41] <LadyMist> NO whip hits...
[21:41] <ravenshad> I didn't know that EZ...
[21:41] <{sonja}JP> explain pls
[21:41] <LadyMist> BAD for the brain cells...
[21:41] <pbear^> it's the pressure gas they use
[21:41] * LadyMist abhors whip hits...
[21:41] <ravenshad> whip hits LM?
[21:42] <Ron1962> Yeah....oxygen deprivation.......
[21:42] <pbear^> reddi whip ravenshad
[21:42] <LadyMist> course since the stroke I can't afford to lose any more than I have already loist...LOL
[21:42] <ravenshad> Ohhh...ok panda..sniffing it..I understand..
[21:42] <pbear^> yes
[21:42] <LadyMist> reddi whip inhalition...
[21:42] <LadyMist> BAD thing...'G'
[21:42] <ravenshad> thanks LM :)
[21:42] <LadyMist> yep....
[21:43] <ravenshad> I think a rape scene is one of the most difficult role play scenes to enact...so many things could go wrong..and so many things have to be thought of, considered and looked at before attempting it..
[21:43] <Ron1962> Can role play enhance a relationship?......
[21:43] <pbear^> sometimes
[21:43] <EZRiser> or add spice to ..
[21:44] <ravenshad> yes..if it is something everyone involved enjoys doing...it could make them feel closer to one another...
[21:44] <ravenshad> yes EZ
[21:45] <EZRiser> wouldnt role play be another, less obtrusive avenue of expanding and exploring ones limits
[21:45] <ravenshad> do you think role play can enhance a relationship, is the question on the table..
[21:45] <pbear^> i think so EZRiser
[21:45] <ravenshad> yes I think so EZ..
[21:45] <ravenshad> how can role play enhance a relationship? (to expand upon the original question)
[21:45] <{sonja}JP> everyone talks about "keeping the spice" - role play would def. be an avenue to that...
[21:46] <ravenshad> yes..it would be that..
[21:46] <pbear^> it can help build trust
[21:46] <ravenshad> how so panda?
[21:46] * Ron1962 nods...... A "safe" way of realizing a fantasy which could not be acted out in any other way....legally anyway....like the rape scene.....or the kidnap scene
[21:46] * Ron1962 listens to panda
[21:47] <pbear^> i like ageplay and the Mistress i have now allows it so we can get to know each other more so and i have learned to trust her fully because of this
[21:47] <ravenshad> ok that makes sense since in age play..one person has to literally think with the mind of the age they selected..usually fairly young..
[21:48] <pbear^> i am about 10
[21:48] * Ron1962 nods....Not exactly my cup of tea....but I can see how that would allow you to let her see deeper facutes of you panda
[21:48] <panda^> yes it does Ron1962
[21:48] <ravenshad> it would also cause a deeper sense of vulnerability, thus requiring more trust...
[21:49] <panda^> and i see how she acts in the role of the Mommy and then how to expect her to be as the Mistress
[21:49] <ravenshad> ageplay is one of the more common role play scenarios..not just for lifetsyle bdsm relationships, but for those who engage in play sessions only...why do you think that is?
[21:49] <panda^> we have been together 4 times now and it is working well
[21:49] * Ron1962 nods....I think role play could be valuable in that aspect....to keep the spice...and to allow oneself to open up things that they as themselves would want to keep hidden.....
[21:50] <panda^> some of us cant be in this 24/7
[21:50] <panda^> because of other committments
[21:50] <panda^> so play sessions have to be sufficient
[21:50] <{sonja}JP> i dont know raven - thats a good question
[21:50] <panda^> or brief 24/7 times
[21:51] <ravenshad> I wasn't asking why a play session relationship..I was asking what the attraction is to ageplay panda..
[21:51] <panda^> we usually have about 3-4 days together at a time
[21:51] * Ron1962 chuckles.....Cause some like me refuse to grow up?
[21:51] <ravenshad> question on the table is why do you think people are drawn to age play sessions?
[21:51] <ravenshad> that could be Ron..
[21:52] <panda^> same here Ron1962 i think
[21:52] <{sonja}JP> or perhaps it is just one of those "forbidden things"
[21:52] <panda^> a part of me is still a little girl
[21:52] <ravenshad> what about a person trying to "recapture their childhood" and/or get the mother/father love they never had as a child?
[21:52] <EZRiser> Ron .. we grow older .. not up .. toys just get more expensive
[21:52] <ravenshad> yes..could be that as well sonja..
[21:52] <ravenshad> LOL EZ
[21:52] <panda^> very possibly ravenshad
[21:52] * Ron1962 smiles and ^5's EZRiser
[21:52] <{sonja}JP> i have noticed that problem in men EZ
[21:52] <{sonja}JP> lol
[21:52] <ravenshad> LOLOL sonja
[21:53] <EZRiser> hey .. I resemble that remark
[21:53] <{sonja}JP> oooohhh - did i say that outloud?
[21:53] <panda^> only difference between the men and the boys is the price and size of their toys
[21:53] <Ron1962> Yeah you did {sonja}JP.....Hey...where is JP anyway.....LOL
[21:53] <ravenshad> could using age play as a way to heal past neglect (real or imagined) be a dangerous thing to do?
[21:53] * panda^ whistles innocently
[21:53] <{sonja}JP> He is different......
[21:53] <panda^> dangerous??? how so???
[21:53] * Amax chuckles and slowly shakes his head
[21:53] <{sonja}JP> i would say no, if you both knew what you were doing
[21:54] <{sonja}JP> yes, if only one is aware
[21:54] <Ron1962> I dont know about dangerious....but if one was subject to abuse of some type it could open old wounds....
[21:54] <panda^> true Ron1962
[21:54] <ravenshad> possible flash backs, say the person had lived through sexual abuse or something, and doesn't fully recall it..then gets into age play..and inadvertently the memories are triggered...
[21:54] <ravenshad> yes Ron..
[21:55] <ravenshad> what about mentally? if age play is taken to a 24/7 relationship..done all the time...could it cause mental problems with someone though process or things like that?
[21:55] * panda^ craves love and acceptance from Mistress as Mommy because she was starved for it growing up she thinks
[21:55] <ravenshad> that's possible panda..
[21:55] <Ron1962> Then again....sometimes the only way to heal those types of wounds is to bring them out in the open.....hopefully in a controlled enviornment....with a qualified speciallist...and I am not thinking of Dominatrix Madeline
[21:56] <{sonja}JP> but i think it is possible to crave the same even when one had it as a child...
[21:56] <panda^> bringing them out is good but fullfilling them is the key
[21:56] <ravenshad> yes it is sonja...
[21:56] <{sonja}JP> i LOVE the daddy in Master
[21:56] <{sonja}JP> and i had 2 great daddys - one of whom is a Dom - online and partial r/l
[21:56] <panda^> i never had a mommy in r/l
[21:57] <{sonja}JP> hmmmmm - Yes, i have wondered about that....
[21:57] <panda^> had an aunt who was a cargiver
[21:57] <{sonja}JP> i am sorry panda
[21:57] <panda^> is ok sonja
[21:57] <ravenshad> I'm sorry to hear that panda...
[21:57] <panda^> s'ok ravenshad
[21:57] <panda^> Mistress is doing a wonderful job at present and we are working on it
[21:58] <ravenshad> do you think there is a certain amount of role play involved in any bdsm relationship? (possibly in the area of general play sessions)
[21:58] <panda^> never had a dad either, had an uncle who worked ALL the time
[21:58] <panda^> yes
[21:58] <ravenshad> where panda?
[21:58] <{sonja}JP> oh yes - there is role play in any relationship - usually - just not always as defined
[21:59] <ravenshad> ok..where sonja? or an example please
[21:59] <panda^> a Dom is always a Dom but not always in total control in most relationships in r/l
[21:59] <{sonja}JP> {sitting in spotlight - thinking}
[21:59] * Ron1962 thinks....No...I dont think so.......or rather it doesnt have to be considered role play...when one of the children comes to me I wear the Daddy hat.....looking at things from that perspective......
[21:59] <panda^> and a sub might have to be in control in r/l at times
[22:00] <{sonja}JP> is that role play or simply variations of YOU?
[22:00] <panda^> we all have our r/l roles to play
[22:00] <ravenshad> I don't consider that role play panda...that is just being human and living one's life...
[22:00] <panda^> it's me sonja but it's a role i play too
[22:01] <{sonja}JP> like i said earlier, i role played vanilla for YEARS
[22:01] <panda^> it's a hat i wear
[22:01] <ravenshad> bineg sub is a role for you panda?
[22:01] * Ron1962 sighs...Well better to see you for a few minutes than not at all
[22:01] <ravenshad> being even..
[22:01] <panda^> i'd say no to that raven as being sub is my first love
[22:01] <{sonja}JP> seriously - i acted a certain way (contrary to what i wanted) cause i couldnt be submissive to my husband
[22:01] <ravenshad> that would be enacting a role sonja..
[22:02] <{sonja}JP> as opposed to role Playing? - ok - makes sense
[22:02] <panda^> when given the opportunity to do so subbing is my love
[22:02] <ravenshad> I see panda
[22:03] <panda^> when i have to be in control of things that is a role to me
[22:03] <ravenshad> for me, being a submissive is always there..has always been there...even when I am in a situation where I am in control..it does not change the fact that I am submissive...
[22:03] <panda^> and one i do not like to play
[22:03] * Ron1962 nods.....
[22:03] * LAR^ would say being a sub is something one is or is not. SUBMITTING is an active action, and that one does by choice
[22:03] <{sonja}JP> but it changes the actions you have to do
[22:04] <ravenshad> being in control of something does not make a person less of a submissive panda...
[22:04] <panda^> yes it does sonja
[22:04] <{sonja}JP> i would agree with Lar
[22:04] <ravenshad> well said Lar.. :)
[22:04] <panda^> true raven it just makes that one act differently than they would prefer
[22:04] * Ron1962 listens to his little ...ok younger brother
[22:05] <ravenshad> for example, as a mom, I am in control ...I have to be...but I don't just "play mommy"....I am still a submissive, but I know that any acts of submitting to my children, would be really wrong..
[22:05] <ravenshad> be well AB :)
[22:05] <{sonja}JP> oh definitely
[22:05] <panda^> very true raven
[22:05] <panda^> mommy is not a submitting role
[22:05] <panda^> it's a Domme role
[22:05] <{sonja}JP> not at all
[22:05] <LAR^> LOL, younger by a few hours. But I would also point out, elle is collared to me. She WILL submit to me, but does not always feel submissive. It is up to me to TAKE and keep the control.
[22:06] <Ron1962> Night AB
[22:06] <ravenshad> it is not a domme role either in reality panda...it is a parenting thing...
[22:06] * Ron1962 nods.....Thats part of you LAR...to take that control....
[22:06] <panda^> that is ok raven......i know what you mean
[22:06] <{sonja}JP> Master's ears perked - He says He has the same "problem" with me...
[22:06] <{sonja}JP> i think i was just called a brat!
[22:06] <panda^> lol sonja
[22:07] <ravenshad> I can see how being a submissive in a situation that requires the sub be in control can feel like a "role" the sub has to play...
[22:07] <ravenshad> LOL sonja
[22:07] * Ron1962 chuckles....Really {sonja}JP?......how veyr unusual.....LOL
[22:07] <{sonja}JP> He knows He loves having to take that control....
[22:07] <LAR^> sonja, that is what happens when one takes a strong and intelligent woman to sub
[22:07] <{sonja}JP> Exactly
[22:07] <panda^> i enjoy being with and caring for children as you know raven but i do see it as a role for me as i have none of my own
[22:08] <ravenshad> ok panda..
[22:08] <LAR^> And the worse thing you can say is: Just do what I say and nobody will get hurt <G>
[22:08] <ravenshad> lets get back on the topic of role play scenes.. :)
[22:08] <panda^> i'd rather be submitting to Mistress
[22:08] <{sonja}JP> okeeday raven
[22:09] <ravenshad> the area of what feels like a role and what doesn't feel that way vs. is it really a role, is far too individual to really discus...
[22:09] <panda^> nods
[22:09] <{sonja}JP> true
[22:09] <LAR^> Role play, vs intensification of what we really are?
[22:09] <{sonja}JP> he is good...
[22:09] <panda^> something like that LAR^
[22:10] <ravenshad> ok, maybe I'm having a brain fart..but what do you mean Lar?
[22:12] <LAR^> OK, to me the only real role playing I may do is ageplay. Otherwise any play that I do in BDSM, even when assuming a persona is just an intensification of the rolse we already share in real life. That make any sense, or did I just talk in a circle?
[22:12] <panda^> makes a lot of sense to me
[22:12] * Ron1962 hands LAR a compass
[22:13] <ravenshad> it makes sense...but then I have to wonder, if assuming the role of a rapist, interrogator, doctor, or such..would then not be role play to you?
[22:13] * LAR^ notes no matter which way he turns it points at Raven
[22:13] <ravenshad> I think we define role play differently Lar.. :)
[22:13] <{sonja}JP> but even in age play - couldnt you still say that it is "the child in you?
[22:13] <Ron1962> Yeah that makes sense......letting one aspect shine brighter than the others.....for we all have different aspects in ourselves.....
[22:13] <panda^> yes sonja
[22:14] <panda^> stop and think how many hats one wears each day
[22:14] * Ron1962 blinks........hands LAR a real compass....Errr...thats my sexy monitor......
[22:14] <LAR^> I thought about that while I was typing, just where the going in circles part came from. But here is the thing with that, I was an actor for a lot of years. Even the emotions of those roles I assume come from within me. Unless, I was to go so far as to create a history for the characther (What I do on stage). I won't do that in BDSM, it is too dangerous.
[22:14] <panda^> lol Ron1962
[22:14] <{sonja}JP> perhaps - for our discussion - we could say that role play was any "scene" where we are in a role that is not one of our everyday roles?
[22:14] <{sonja}JP> lol Ron
[22:14] <LAR^> That definition would work better
[22:15] <panda^> agreed sonja
[22:15] <ravenshad> I don't agree..sorry
[22:15] <panda^> i can see where you are coming from LAR^ and i agree
[22:15] <panda^> dont agree with what raven?
[22:15] <ravenshad> because basically then..there is no "role playing" at all..everyone has the potential to be anything at any time in a regular day...
[22:16] <ravenshad> that definition of role play..it is far too generalized..completely erases "role play"
[22:16] <ravenshad> lets see..what roles do I take every day.
[22:16] <ravenshad> interrogator: trying to get the truth out of one of my kids
[22:16] <{sonja}JP> ah - i see
[22:16] <panda^> i see doing things i have to do but dont like as role play
[22:16] <ravenshad> doctor/nurse: taking care of an injury or boo boo
[22:16] <ravenshad> accountant: pay the bills and balance the checkbook
[22:16] <LAR^> Of course they do, the key word there being POTENTIAL. Every man is a potential rapist. We don't for whatever reason. Be it fear, morals or emotion. But the POTENTIAL is there
[22:16] * EZRiser chuckles .. mission impossible
[22:16] <ravenshad> chef: cook any meal
[22:17] <ravenshad> even the more dangerous roles of "rapist"...can be applied to any human being the honestly explores thier dark side..
[22:17] <{sonja}JP> ok - i was going for - not mommy/daddy or whatever your job is
[22:17] <panda^> nods to raven
[22:17] <ravenshad> so if you enact a role play scene, you are acting out the role of a rapist....you are not just intensifying who you already are Lar...
[22:17] <LAR^> When one considers that rape is not about sex, but about power i agree Raven
[22:18] <{sonja}JP> ah - which is why i think the rape fantasy is so appealing to subs/Doms
[22:18] <panda^> exactly sonja
[22:18] <ravenshad> yes..that is what the major appeal is about rape scenes..
[22:18] <LAR^> But I am Raven, I am taking control. In the role of the rapist. But the actions are mind. The only TRUE role play IMHO is in the mind.
[22:18] <panda^> the power exchange
[22:19] * Ron1962 listens
[22:19] <panda^> role play is in our minds first LAR^
[22:19] <{sonja}JP> <------confused
[22:19] <ravenshad> then why role play at all, if there is no desire to pretent to be someone you aren't for a while? if it all comes down to who is in control, then role play would not be neccessary because any sub knows who is in control...
[22:19] <ravenshad> me too sonja...there is more to role play than control and who holds the power...
[22:20] <{sonja}JP> the overwhelming - total control - of a rape scene is not something we get everday - least i dont...
[22:20] <panda^> no
[22:21] <{sonja}JP> Master is in charge - sure - but He doesnt TAKE CHARGE constantly or with complete force often
[22:21] <ravenshad> isn't it the entire scene itself that attracts people? the words spoken, the actions in the scene, the costumes, the whole "fantasy"? not just who is in control?
[22:21] <panda^> yes raven
[22:21] <LAR^> OK, I can see where I seem to be contradicting everybody. Role Play or acting out a scene gives one permission to do things. But I would suggest that we are changing the scene, rather than who we are. Changing the rules under very specific circumstances if you will
[22:21] <ravenshad> true sonja...I'm not just talking rape scene however..and am pretty sure that people drawn to age play are not drawn to that particular role play just to feel the control of the mom or dad..
[22:22] <panda^> there's a need that draws one in those directions i think raven
[22:22] <{sonja}JP> boy - funny - i think we are all fairly well in agreement - but cant seem to connect to each other - weird
[22:23] <ravenshad> where I disagree is that there aren't any roles because role play is nothing more than intensifying what we already are...I thought the whole idea was to pretend to be someone else for a while...
[22:24] <panda^> but maybe that someone else is REALLY part of who we really are????
[22:24] <{sonja}JP> do you often play a role that is abhorrent to you?
[22:24] <panda^> i dont
[22:24] <ravenshad> I tend to lack the imagination to actually role play sonja, as i said before, I've never done a role play scene...so I can't really answer that..
[22:25] <{sonja}JP> that didnt come out right
[22:25] <ravenshad> but, on the grounds where you played the role of "vanilla" for years..I can say i played the role of doormat for a while..and hated every minute of it..but did it anyway..so as such, yes I guess I can play a role that is abhorrent to me..
[22:25] * Ron1962 nods....But we all have a bit of all of the facets......Coudl you imagine me as a submissive raven?....niether could I....but I could play one...for a little while.....
[22:25] <{sonja}JP> ok - in role play (i think) we are acting out roles that we arent in every day - but we have a fascination for
[22:25] <ravenshad> or fantasy about sonja...
[22:26] <{sonja}JP> huh?
[22:26] <ravenshad> as fascination for, or fantasy about..I was just adding something to your statement..
[22:26] <panda^> Ron1962 as i can be Domme for a while but i abhor it
[22:26] <panda^> it's not ME
[22:26] * LAR^ would agree in the sense that I believe that within role play, we are giving ourselves PERMISSION to be or behave in a way that for various reasons we can be or do in R/L. Be it ageplay or rape play
[22:27] <{sonja}JP> oh - see, i dont think i could REALLY role play a role that is totally NOT me
[22:27] <ravenshad> yes..Ron, and that would be you playing a role of someone that is not YOU..hence I find it difficult to agree with Lar's statement earlier that there are no "roles" people can play...
[22:27] <ravenshad> ok..that makes sense Lar and that I agree with..
[22:28] <Ron1962> Could role play help a person grow?.........even say role play on IRC?....I started out here in a sense......
[22:29] <panda^> i think so Ron1962
[22:29] <ravenshad> I guess so Ron...
[22:29] <{sonja}JP> Master says we got off on a tangent.....that role play is either a game or not, if it is not, then it is somthing other than role play
[22:29] <ravenshad> thanks sonja..that is what I was trying to say...
[22:30] <ravenshad> thanks JP
[22:30] <Ron1962> Well Said JP
[22:30] <{sonja}JP> Jase is leaving Ron to the "girls" - you are on your own now....
[22:31] <ravenshad> I do understand how role play can be an intensification of who we already are..and how just about any role exists inside every person...
[22:31] <Ron1962> Oh Great Jase...leave me alone with these girls......*Ron perks*
[22:31] * ravenshad can't find the words...sorry..
[22:32] <{sonja}JP> i get you raven - but there is role play - ie - doctor nurse or there is something other than role play - which i cant find the word for
[22:32] <ravenshad> but, the line would be at actually acting out a role...becoming for a short time, another person..not yourself..
[22:32] <ravenshad> yes!
[22:32] <ravenshad> whew..someone found the words..thanks sonja :)
[22:33] <ravenshad> when I think of role play, I think of scenes like the boss with a naughty secretary...an interrogation or a rape fantasy...
[22:33] <{sonja}JP> the "other" is a whole differnt ball game
[22:33] <{sonja}JP> right
[22:33] * Ron1962 thinks....Perhaps there is role play as in the doctor nurse....and perhaps there is the streaching of limits....doing something you wouldnt ordinarily do to see how it feels......but is still in character......
[22:33] <ravenshad> I can see where intensifying "control" is part of every role play scene..
[22:33] <{sonja}JP> ooohh there is one of my favs - boss/secretary
[22:34] <Ron1962> Naughty Secretary?......errr.....do you take dicktation raven?
[22:34] <ravenshad> but, so is the acting of the role itself...acting as the angry boss...the flustered secretary...you see?
[22:34] <{sonja}JP> lol
[22:34] <Ron1962> whoops...sorry for the Freudian typo
[22:34] * ravenshad giggles..oh yeah Ron...every night actually.. LOL
[22:34] <{sonja}JP> uh yeah right Ron
[22:34] <{sonja}JP> typo = sure
[22:35] * panda^ reads all the jabbering and smiles
[22:35] <panda^> school girl/Principal
[22:35] * Ron1962 sighs....so misunderstood....and lowers his head to hide the grin
[22:35] <ravenshad> I thikn you might be on to something with that stretching of limits thing Ron...that would not be role play, that would be an intensification of who/what the people involved already are...
[22:35] <{sonja}JP> <------- short enough to have caught it...
[22:35] <ravenshad> yes panda...that is a role play scene..
[22:36] <Thundernt> Thanks, my server is being a pain.
[22:36] <ravenshad> I hate when that happens Thundernt, it drive me nuts :(
[22:36] * Ron1962 hands Thundernt a crop to whip the bad ISP with
[22:36] <panda^> ooooooooooo
[22:36] <{sonja}JP> crop?
[22:37] <{sonja}JP> *perks*
[22:37] <Thundernt> ranenshad, thanks but I prefer my single tail. S~
[22:37] * Ron1962 watches as a cold wind seems to pass through all the ladies.....
[22:37] * panda^ gave Mistress a nice crop this last time
[22:37] <ravenshad> ummm...I didn't give you a crop..Ron did.. :)
[22:37] * ravenshad giggles..
[22:37] <Ron1962> LOL raven
[22:37] <panda^> oops
[22:37] <{sonja}JP> i just gave Master a nice flogger :-)
[22:37] <ravenshad> ok...lets see...anything else about role play someone wants to cover?
[22:38] <panda^> Mistress has so many toys that she cant lift her bag
[22:38] <Ron1962> LOL.....See you next week {sonja}JP......LOL
[22:38] <{sonja}JP> did we cover anything?
[22:38] <{sonja}JP> um - that was thursday - i meant i bought Him one....
[22:38] <{sonja}JP> lol Ron
[22:38] <ravenshad> we covered lots of stuff sonja :)
[22:38] <Ron1962> Yeah that we all have some slightly different ideas about role play
[22:38] <ravenshad> LOL Ron
[22:38] <{sonja}JP> hmmmmmmmm - but maybe i Should go....
[22:38] <panda^> yes Ron1962
[22:38] <{sonja}JP> exactly - but thats ok
[22:39] <ravenshad> well..we never did discuss the general things needed/desired for a role play scene..like LM had started..the costumes and such...
[22:39] <panda^> i have yet to meet anyone in D/s who has the exact same idea of what it is as anyone else
[22:39] <ravenshad> yes it is ok sonja..there isn't much discussion if everyone has the same ideas.. :)
[22:39] <Ron1962> Ohhh...costumes...Yes....must have disposable clothing.....
[22:39] <{sonja}JP> or old
[22:39] <ravenshad> do you think the clothing worn (or not worn) for a role play scene enhance the scene?
[22:39] <{sonja}JP> - dont tell Him i told yall this....
[22:40] <panda^> yes it does
[22:40] <Ron1962> I like the word disposable....cause I like ripping them off.....LOL
[22:40] <ravenshad> such as for boss/secretary..would it help the scene if the boss wore a suit, the secrtary a nice work type dress or skirt set?
[22:40] <{sonja}JP> never mind
[22:40] <panda^> it helps put one in the mind set
[22:40] <{sonja}JP> definitely
[22:40] <ravenshad> what sonja?
[22:40] <{sonja}JP> both people
[22:40] * Ron1962 nods....Yes.....would help set the mood.....
[22:40] <ravenshad> you can say something..I just wanted to finish my thought before my mind lost it somewhere.. LOL
[22:40] <panda^> whatcha gonna tell us sonja????
[22:40] <{sonja}JP> both for wearing the clothes and seeing the clothes
[22:41] <ravenshad> I have to agree that the clothes would help the scene..
[22:41] <Ron1962> ana doesnt understand the need for role play......but thats just her.....
[22:41] <panda^> oh they do lots
[22:41] <{sonja}JP> oh - i was just gonna say that - never mind - i realized it is something i shouldnt say
[22:41] <panda^> in my case anyways
[22:41] * ravenshad hands the discussion to Ron so she can go potty..brb
[22:41] <panda^> who is ana?
[22:42] <ravenshad> ana is ayli
[22:42] <ravenshad> brb
[22:42] <panda^> kimmie?
[22:42] <Ron1962> anathyn.......She lives here as well......
[22:42] <{sonja}JP> is that why she is not here tonight?
[22:42] * panda^ waves to kimmie
[22:42] <Ron1962> What about props?....would a big desk help with the pricipal school girl....secratary /boss scene?
[22:42] <ravenshad> ana grabs the keyboard..
[22:42] <panda^> yep prolly would
[22:43] <{sonja}JP> helps - but not necessay
[22:43] <Ron1962> Tow puters....
[22:43] <{sonja}JP> necessary even
[22:43] * panda^ hugs da kimmers tight
[22:43] <Ron1962> two even
[22:43] <{sonja}JP> tow them where?
[22:43] <ravenshad> <ana> no I'm not skipping the discussion because of that.. I fell asleep..
[22:43] <{sonja}JP> i too phunny
[22:43] <ravenshad> <ana> just woke up.. Hi panda.. *hugs*
[22:43] <panda^> raven works you too hard kimmers???
[22:44] <elle{LDS}> :))))
[22:44] <Ron1962> LOL panda
[22:44] <ravenshad> <ana> no panda.
[22:45] <panda^> was j/k kimmers
[22:45] <Ron1962> Ok......So props are nice....but not nessicary....what would you think might be nessisary?
[22:45] * panda^ gives raven a hug and a smooch
[22:45] <elle{LDS}> a very creative mind :)
[22:45] <ravenshad> <ana> smile, probably it would be neccasary to have certain props.. just not.. ALL of them..
[22:45] <{sonja}JP> depends on how good the couple is at "getting into it"
[22:45] <panda^> props help but the mindset is most important
[22:45] <elle{LDS}> perhaps...creating the setting before starting the scene...?
[22:45] <{sonja}JP> right - some would need very little - others would need a lot
[22:46] <ravenshad> <ana nods
[22:46] * Ron1962 nods.....Like I would like the big desk.....hehehehehe...make it that much easier to bend the vict....errr...the submisive over it
[22:46] <panda^> lol Ron1962
[22:46] <ravenshad> <ana laughs
[22:46] <{sonja}JP> simple doctor/nurse boss/sec. might only need clothes...
[22:47] <panda^> i doubt Ron1962 needs a desk to bend someone over tho....he has a knee i'm sure
[22:47] <{sonja}JP> nother Freudian slip ron?
[22:47] <Ron1962> Oh no {sonja}JP.....would need the gynocological chair too.....LOL...never mind...was a visual I had......LOL
[22:47] <{sonja}JP> ROFLMAO
[22:47] <panda^> o geez
[22:47] <panda^> now he's a doc
[22:47] <ravenshad> *ana opes her eyes wide.. gods.. explain that to the kids
[22:47] * Ron1962 looks at {sonja}JP and tries out his best innocent look
[22:48] <{sonja}JP> sonja has 2 boys - it doesnt work
[22:48] <panda^> lol ana
[22:48] <ravenshad> *ana laughs..
[22:48] <Ron1962> Ohhh....good thought ana.....that would be a bit hard to explain wouldnt it....LOL
[22:48] <panda^> nods
[22:48] <{sonja}JP> you could use a hairdressers shampoo chair...
[22:49] <ravenshad> <ana> yes, it would be very hard to explain.. "Daddy, whats that chair? uhhhhh.. nuffin.. really.. GO back to your room!"
[22:49] <Ron1962> Drats......thought I could fool ya with the innocent look...somehow no one ever seems to believe I am innocent as the driven snow.....
[22:49] <{sonja}JP> used to have one of those myself...
[22:49] <panda^> nope Ron1962 cuz yer not
[22:49] <{sonja}JP> b/c we have iqs over 50
[22:49] <panda^> lol sonja
[22:49] <ravenshad> laughs
[22:49] * Ron1962 sighs...and realizes that this is a tough crowd.......
[22:50] <Ron1962> Would you believe the snow on the side of a country road?
[22:50] <ravenshad> <ana> we love you Ron.. but.. uhmmmmmmm.. anyone that has known you fifteen minutes knows your not innocent.. nice roleplay though :)
[22:50] <panda^> maybe
[22:50] * elle{LDS} laughs suddenly, loudly, and off timing...
[22:50] <Ron1962> Would you believe the snow on the side of a an inner sity intersection?
[22:50] <{sonja}JP> i was just thinking that...
[22:50] <Ron1962> Would you believe the snow on the side of a Major highway?
[22:50] <{sonja}JP> about the role play raven
[22:50] * elle{LDS} coughs, "oh...sorry...thought i was supposed to be laughing..."
[22:50] <elle{LDS}> :)
[22:50] <panda^> s'ok elle{LDS}
[22:51] <ravenshad> <ana> raven is still afk actually, it's kimmie/ana/ayli
[22:51] <{sonja}JP> Master says i never get the "innocent" school girl right......very NOT ME
[22:51] * Ron1962 smiles at elle{LDS}....and hugs her again
[22:51] <{sonja}JP> oh - ok ana *s*
[22:51] <ravenshad> <ana> I can't do innocent either.. wonder why
[22:51] <panda^> me either ana....NO WAY
[22:51] <panda^> i tell MIstress panda is a GOOD bear but she dont buy it
[22:52] * panda^ shrugs
[22:52] <Ron1962> Cause we know you ana........and your eyes give you away....cause while your pretending innocents the litle lights in your eyes are saying the kinkiest things
[22:52] <{sonja}JP> i tried to tell Him i was shy and demure once also - He was so rude - He fell off His chair laughing
[22:52] <Ron1962> LOL.....I knew I liked JP
[22:52] <ravenshad> <ana RON~!!!!
[22:52] <panda^> oh no sonja
[22:52] <ravenshad> <ana I am not thinking.. well.. uhmmm.. maybe I am
[22:52] * Ron1962 laughs at ana
[22:52] <Ron1962> Yes you are.......
[22:52] * Corgan listens
[22:53] <panda^> ana do u have a pic sis?
[22:53] <ravenshad> <ana grins
[22:53] <ravenshad> <ana> not on this computer
[22:53] <panda^> i'd like one if and when ya can
[22:53] <ravenshad> <ana> raven's back.. *HUGS* bbl :)
[22:53] <panda^> i have a new one also
[22:54] <panda^> bye ana
[22:54] * ravenshad returns
[22:54] <panda^> wb ravenshad
[22:54] <Corgan> wb raven
[22:54] * Ron1962 nods.....What other type of role scenes can you imagine?...the boss/secratary....the school girl/principla.....the cop/thief.....what else?
[22:55] <{sonja}JP> totally blank mind......
[22:55] <ravenshad> thanks all..
[22:55] <elle{LDS}> interrogator/prisoner, rapist/rape-ee
[22:55] <Ron1962> WB little raven
[22:55] <ravenshad> ty big Ron
[22:55] <panda^> judge/defendant
[22:55] * Ron1962 smiles......
[22:55] <{sonja}JP> ooooh - Big Ron?
[22:55] <Ron1962> Ohhh...nice one panda
[22:55] <ravenshad> guard/prisoner (that one gets done alot)
[22:55] <elle{LDS}> and then perhaps that of animals with their trainers (ponies, doggies, etc etc)
[22:55] <{sonja}JP> there i go again - talkin out loud...
[22:55] <ravenshad> yes elle..
[22:56] <{sonja}JP> guard/prisoner - really?
[22:56] <{sonja}JP> i mean done a lot?
[22:56] <ravenshad> well..those bad b movies...female prison movies..
[22:56] * ravenshad giggles
[22:56] <Ron1962> How about two teenagers......first time thing?
[22:56] <ravenshad> could be done Ron..
[22:56] <{sonja}JP> we did that for real....
[22:57] <elle{LDS}> one thing that should be discussed...and i dunno if this has been...is the psychological ramifications of more "edgy" role play...such as along the lines of rape/prisoner/kidnapping, etc
[22:57] <Ron1962> Or the popular variation of a rape...date rape.....
[22:57] <{sonja}JP> that is "walking down memory lane
[22:57] <ravenshad> I think a role play scene requires imagination..and because of that, the combinations are probably endless...
[22:57] <elle{LDS}> esp since there are a lot of players out there who seek to make that type of roleplay as close to reality as possible
[22:57] <Ron1962> Well....that and a lot of duct tape raven
[22:57] <panda^> we did talk about it elle{LDS}
[22:57] <Corgan> lol
[22:57] <{sonja}JP> you need to hide all that duct tape raven.....
[22:58] <{sonja}JP> that stuff leaves icky residue...
[22:58] <ravenshad> yes elle...we discussed it..the possibility of bringing out past abuse, the possibility of getting "lost" in the roles...the possibility of outside interference..
[22:58] <Ron1962> LOL......Bet you she will buy duct tape now {sonja}JP
[22:58] <ravenshad> I will sonja :)
[22:58] <Ron1962> Oh drats
[22:58] <{sonja}JP> gotcha
[22:58] <elle{LDS}> damn...missed that part. bummer.
[22:58] <Ron1962> LAR was here...should be a log of it if LAR keeps logs
[22:58] <panda^> raven has the log elle{LDS}
[22:58] <{sonja}JP> ropes Ron - ropes - soft ones for the most part
[22:59] <ravenshad> well elle, feel free to give your opinion of the edgier role plays..what you think needs to be done when setting one up..what possible after affects are there..
[22:59] <panda^> i am having a lot of trouble finding soft cotton rope
[22:59] <ravenshad> the log will be posted on the website.. :)
[22:59] <{sonja}JP> try belts
[22:59] * Ron1962 nods...Got that {sonja}JP....and velcro handcuffs........and suspension handcuffs too....and ankle cuffs and.....oh my...you would think I was kinky or something
[22:59] <ravenshad> Lar wasn't here for the rape scene discussion Ron..
[22:59] <elle{LDS}> oh goodness...trouble? try wal-mart...
[22:59] <elle{LDS}> heck, they've the best rope there for making clothespin zippers
[23:00] * ravenshad thinks about making it a hard limit that Ron is not allowed to go to wal mart..<giggle>
[23:01] <ravenshad> well, we've reached the time limit for the discussion nights...shall we end it here?
[23:01] <panda^> ours dont have it
[23:02] * elle{LDS} always gets ropes at wal-mart...and the stores are cookie-cutter
[23:02] <elle{LDS}> you gotta know where to look for it at wal mart.
[23:02] <panda^> usually but the only rope i found was boating stuff even in the place where clothesline was
[23:02] <panda^> ok where
[23:02] <elle{LDS}> try the camping sections...or in hardware (not where clothesline would be)
[23:02] <elle{LDS}> i know that here the ropes are in camping
[23:02] <panda^> i have a friend in fla who makes macrame' handcuffs
[23:03] <ravenshad> Next week's topic is D/s without S/m...(END OF DISCUSSION FOR LOGGING PURPOSES)
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